Under the current draft of the Democrat health care legislation, members of Congress are curiously exempt from the government-run health care option, keeping their existing health plans and services on Capitol Hill. If Members of Congress believe so strongly that government-run health care is the best solution for hard working American families, I think it only fitting that Americans see them lead the way. Senator McCain and Newt Gingrich like the plan and McCain has started a concurrent resolution.
What do you think about that? What's good for the goose is good for the gander! You can click on this link and voice your approval of Fleming's Resolution HR 615: Fleming Resolution HR615 My pal, Anne, sent me the following interesting facts about women over the age of 50. Although I believe in equal opportunity for women of all ages, I concur wholeheartedly with the following...
A woman over 50 will never wake you in the middle of the night and ask, "What are you thinking?" She doesn't care what you think. If a woman over 50 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do, and it's usually more interesting.
Women over 50 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you if they think they can get away with it. Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it's like to be unappreciated.
Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 50. Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 50 is far sexier than her younger counterpart. Older women are forthright and honest. They'll tell you right off if you are a jerk, if you are acting like one. You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her.
For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed, hot woman over 50, there is a paunchy old relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year old waitress. For all those men who say, 'Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free? Here's an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage. Why? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage! One of the by-products of the current recession is a rash of new babies. It seems that people that are affected by the recession and are pinching their pennies have resorted to that age old recreation of entertaining each other. Statistics show that this has caused a mini baby boomlet, if you will.
Older people have been affected as well and many have resorted to oral sex. Before going to their separate bedrooms, the wife yells, "Screw you!", to which the husband replies, "Screw you too!"
Whether this is all true or not, bedroom recreation has always been one of my favorite sports. I know it sure beats bowling!
Mary Travers, one-third of the hugely popular 1960s folk trio Peter, Paul and Mary, has died after a battle with leukemia. Travers' voice helped carry the trio's greatest hits including "Puff the Magic Dragon," "If I Had a Hammer" and "Leaving on a Jet Plane." For me, personally, the sounds of Peter, Paul and Mary bring back fond memories during my "bell bottom trouser" years and I will miss her. Mary Travers died at Danbury Hospital in Connecticut on Wednesday. She was 72.This Date In History: 1810; Chile joined the revolt against Spanish rule in South America when the colonial governor in Santiago was deposed. 1851; The first issue of the New York Daily Times appears. The word "Daily" will be dropped from the newspaper's title six years later. 1895; African American educator Booker T. Washington makes his Atlanta Compromise speech, in which he encourages blacks to accept their inferior social position while working for economic self-reliance.
1961; United Nations secretary general Dag Hammarskjöld dies in a plane crash in Africa while attempting to arrange a ceasefire in the Republic of the Congo (now the Democratic Republic of the Congo). 1970; Rock guitarist Jimi Hendrix dies of drug-related causes at the age of 27 in London. Picture Of The Day: As you may have noticed, there is no shortage of "jackass" photoshop pictures as the Prez has made the word quite famous after his latest remark about Kanye West. Today's pictures are consistent with Obama's jackass remarks with the exception of two pictures.
Today's picture of the day has nothing to do with jackasses, but it struck me funny. The though of a banana depicted as the typical "dirty old man" made me laugh. The other picture is my pal Garnett's ass, which he is prone to show quite often. John is proud of his ass and he is quick to remind me that he has shown his ass in many places.
Printable Things I Never Told You: 1) Kanye West was pretty hurt when he heard that President Obama called him a jackass, but Vice President Joe Biden said, “Ah, you get used to it.” 2) When you cross the Godfather with a philosopher, you get an offer you can't understand. 3) That guy who threw the shoe at President George W. Bush was released from prison after serving nine months. He said he was tortured. They made him bathe every day. 4) There is a positive side to "Cash for Clunkers." It’s taken seven hundred thousand Obama bumper stickers off the road. 5) The other day, Jennifer Lopez was at the White House and she got a private tour of the Oval Office. So for once, the biggest ass at the White House wasn’t Joe Biden.....and that's five !Birthdays: My pal, Lisa. Happy Birthday love 19XX, Samuel Johnson, writer and lexicographer 1709, Jean Bernard Léon Foucault, physicist 1819, John Diefenbaker, Canadian prime minister 1895, Agnes de Mille, dancer and choreographer 1905, Greta Garbo, Swedish-American actress, noted for retiring and subsequently becoming a recluse when she was still at the height of her popularity 1905. The AREA51 Retirement Home Bar and Grill: An elderly couple was attending church services. About halfway through she leans over and said to her husband, "I just let out a silent fart. What do you think I should do?" Her husband replied, "Put a new battery in your hearing aid."
The Hits Just Keep On Coming: My thanks to my pal, Anne, my pal Gipsy, and my pal, Kay, for their contributions to today's entry.
A child custody case was held in court. The judge felt that the mother and father were both fit to be parents and therefore couldn't decide who he should grant full custody to. So he asks the little boy, "Would you like to live with your mother?" The boys says, "No!" The judge asks, "Why not?" The boy says, "Because she beats me." The judge says "Okay, then you'll go live with your father." The boy cries, "Oh no! He beats me too!"Dumbfounded, the judge asks "Okay who do you want to live with?" The boy says, "I want to live with the Miami Dolphins." The judge asks, "Why is that?" The boys says, "They never beat anybody."
A mother was working in the kitchen listening to her 5 year old son playing with his new electric train in the living room. She heard the train stop and her son saying, "All of you sons of bitches who want off, get the hell off now, cause this is the last stop! And all of you sons of bitches who are getting on, sit your asses down 'cause we're pulling out of the station" The horrified mother went in and told her son, "We don't use that kind of language in this house. Now, I want you to go to your room and you are to stay there for two hours. When you come out, you may play with your train, but I want you to use nice language."
Two hours later, the son came out of the bedroom and resumed playing with his train. Soon the train stopped and the boy says,"All passengers please remember to take all of your belongings with you. We thank you and hope your trip was a pleasant one. We hope you will ride with us again soon. For those of you just boarding, remember there is no smoking in the train. We hope you will have a pleasant and relaxing journey with us today."
The mother overheard the boy and smiled. Then the child added, "For those of you who are pissed off about the two hour delay, please see the bitch in the kitchen."
That's it for today my little tootsie rolls. Remember, a woman's rule of thumb is that if it has tires or testicles, you're going to have trouble with it. I'm sure glad I don't have tires.
I'm going to AREA51 for happy hour with my pals and later on, there's a good chance I'll be gallivanting. More on Monday.
Stay Tuned !
Great post and Thanks for stopping by the Motivation Station! Greetings from Los Angeles and a former resident of Ft.Lauderdale. Good ol' FLA, sure miss the cheap golf, oyster bars, smoked fish dip, Joes Stone Crabs.
ReplyDeleteAlways did like a cute ass. You have several here today.
ReplyDeleteLoved this entry Jimmy! I agree with you on the health care plan and on the women over 50 - although it should be 40, I've so been there for many years!
ReplyDeleteHope your evening in Area 51 is a great one. Stop by when you get home, it's a slumber party tonight - we're waiting for our awesome live entertainment!
Thanks for stopping by the new blog too :-)
ROFLMAO!!! That train joke made me choke on my Coke!
ReplyDeleteMany of the doctors when asked about the new health care plan said they plan to stop practicing. Now how is that going to help. Loved all the jokes and graphics.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you explained to everyone about a woman past the age of 50!
ReplyDeleteGreat Entry!
Hugs, Rose
I tried selling my ass once but it was illegal in pa.
ReplyDeleteLove the new playlist (lots of Hank!!)
ReplyDeleteGreat new proposed amendment to Obamacare!! LOL!! Serves them right!!
After reading this, I can't wait to turn 50.. LOL!!
Sad about Mary Travers!
LOVED ALL the printable things today AND the train joke!!! LOL!!
Enjoy your weekend!!
I hope you mean me...
ReplyDeletelol
love
I agree sir, they need to have they same health care plan. I'm sure they have no co-pays and I believe it's free of charge and last for their lifetime. If that's really Garnett's ass, he's got a cute one! I was so sad when I heard about Mary Traver's passing. I've always lived their music. Linda up here in Washington
ReplyDeleteI meant to say "I have always LOVED their music" (My arthritic fingers aren't working well this morning)
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