I Can't Remember If I've Ever done The Hoochie Coochie

I have done the Hokey Pokey many times, but I just can't remember if I've ever done the Hoochie Coochie. Knowing my personal character, if I was acting on advice from my spiritual advisor, Reverend Johnnie Walker Black, I've probably done the Hoochie Coochie at least once. I used to have a girlfriend who was really good at doing the Hoochie Coochie. Oddly enough, she couldn't do the Hokey Pokey. She just could not grasp what it was all about.

I enjoy the nightlife, especially music and dancing. I remember watching American Bandstand as a teenager, listening to the new songs and paying special attention to the newest dances. I'm sure most of you know that learning the newer dances before going out to parties, dances or nightclubs, is a must. No one likes to look like they're recent graduates of the Arthur Murray School of Dance.

There are numerous dances that have been a lot of fun over the years. Classic dances like the Waltz, the Foxtrot, the Charleston, the very sexy Tango, the Rumbas and the Cha Cha Cha have been a delight.

Of course there's always the dances with the funny names. The Jitterbug, the Twist, the Monkey, the Jerk, the Boogaloo, the Mashed Potatos, the Macarena, the Stroll, the Merengue, the Hustle, the Watusi, the Bump, the Dirty Boogie, the Bristol Stomp, the Limbo, the Funky Chicken, the Freak, the Electric Slide and the Shimmy have kept us entertained and moving our feet.

One my favorite types of music and dances is the Boogie Woogie. Over the years, everybody has danced a form of the Boogie in one form or another. The following video is a prime example of why the Boogie Woogie has stayed alive and well over the years. Coincidentally, I found that the young man in the video dances just like me (sort of).....

Note: Remember to mute my music playlist located on the left sidebar and turn up the volume on your speakers.

One of the more interesting things about Miami is the diverse cultures that offer a little taste of everything, especially in food and dance. The many restaurants and nightclubs appeal to a variety of tastes and each experience is always different.

Each March, a festival called Calle Ocho is held, best known as the biggest street party in the country. More then 1 million people from around the world come to this single-day event! In 1998, more than 119,000 people joined in the world's longest conga line, and the festival still holds its place in the Guinness Book of World Records. You'll see dancing, eating, partying, costumes, street performers and the biggest Latin stars performing. A bit difficult to navigate at times, it is a very intense mixture of different countries and cultures and one hell of a party.

Salsa dancing, one of the more prominent forms of Latin dance dominates the Calle Ocho event and is a very sensual and exciting dance. The following video features two dancers from Hialeah, which adjoins Miami, and gives you a good idea of Salsa dancing at its finest.

The News As I See It: Congratulations to U.S. Olympic Hockey Team for their valiant efforts in the final game. The Americans lost to Canada 3-2 in overtime. Further congratulations to the entire United States Olympic for their great Olympic performances.

This Date In History: 1790; The U.S. Congress authorized the first census. 1803; Ohio became the 17th state in the United States. 1864; Rebecca Lee was the first black woman awarded a medical degree. 1867; Nebraska became the 37th state in the United States.

1872; Yellowstone became the world's first National Park. 1932; The 20-month-old son of Charles Lindbergh was kidnapped. 1961; President John F. Kennedy signed a signed an executive order establishing the Peace Corps.

Picture Of The Day: The featured picture (top) is of my good friend Carlos Oliva and Los Sobrinos Del Juez (the judges nephews), one of the top Salsa bands in the nation. Carlos is well known in Miami and around the world and is an excellent vocalist, percussionist and performer.

Printable Things I Never Told You: 1) All the world is a stage and most of us are desperately unrehearsed. 2) I hate gift registries. It used to be just for weddings. Now it's for babies and new homes and graduations from rehab. Picking out the stuff you want and having other people buy it for you isn't gift giving, it's the white people version of looting. 3) My mind works like lightning. One brilliant flash and it is gone. 4) Good things come to those who wait. As does death. An iPhone for an iPhone, a bluetooth for a Bluetooth. 5) Jesus saves. Other deities also promise similar benefits.....and that's five !

Birthdays: Frederic Chopin, composer 1810, Augustus Saint-Gaudens 1848 Glenn Miller bandleader, and composer 1904, David Niven actor 1910, Ralph Ellison, American author 1914, Robert Lowell poet 1917, Yitzhak Rabin Israeli Prime Minister 1922, Harry Belafonte singer, actor 1927.

The AREA 51 Retirement Home Bar and Grill: A man and his wife were celebrating 50 years together. Their three kids,all very successful, all agreed to a Sunday dinner in their honor. "Happy Anniversary Mom & Dad" gushed son number one, a surgeon, "Sorry I'm running late. I had an emergency at the hospital with a patient, you know how it is, and didn't have time to get you a gift." The father said, "Not to worry, the important thing is that we're all together today."

Son number two, a lawyer, arrived and announced, "You and Mom look great Dad". I just flew in from Los Angeles between depositions and didn't have time to shop for you". The father said, "It's nothing, we're glad you were able to come."

Just then the daughter,a marketing executive, arrived. "Hello and Happy Anniversary! I'm sorry but my boss is sending me out of town and I was really busy packing, so I didn't have time to get you anything."

After they finished dessert, the father said, "There's something your mother and I have wanted to tell you for a long time. You see, we were very poor. Despite this, we were able to send each of you to college. Throughout the years your mother and I knew we loved each other very much, but we just never found the time to get married."

The three children gasped and all said, "You mean we're bastards?" The father replied, "Yep, and cheap ones too!"

The Hits Just Keep On Coming: A guy walks into a bar, sits down, and asks, "Bartender, got any specials today?" Bartender answers, "Yes, as a matter of Fact we have a new drink, invented by a gynecologist patron of ours. It's a mix of Pabst Blue Ribbon Beer and Smirnoff Vodka." The guy asks, "Good grief, what do you call that?" The bartender replied, "It's called a "Pabst Smir."

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. He sips it and sets it down. A little monkey swings across the bar and pees in his beer. The man asks the barman who owns the monkey. The barman replies, "The piano player". The man walks over to the piano player and says "Do you know your monkey just pissed in my beer?" The pianist replies, "No, but if you can hum it, I'll play it."

A female officer arrests a drunk. She warns him, "You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be held against you." The drunk replies, "Tits."

That's it for today my little mushrooms. Remember, the optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds. The pessimist fears this is true. I fear the people who author such nonsense. More on Wednesday.

Stay Tuned !