Monday, March 15, 2010

Our Political Leaders Are As Useless As Teats On A Bull !

I'm fed up with the asshole politicians who run this country! They spend more time jockeying for political position than getting any work done. They can't balance the budget, they spend more money than they have and they can't sit down together and draw up a health care plan that covers everyone and is equitable for everyone.

One reason why politicians can't get anything done is that the more intelligent and successful people make far more money in the business world than they would in politics. This, of course, leaves us with the egotistical assholes that can't get a better job. These "winners" make up our government, lining their pockets with all sorts of illegal perks and monies as they wait to retire with a lucrative government pension.

There are so many cheaters, liars, thieves, lunatics and weirdos in government it would take years just to list them all. Crime, corruption, scandal and other forms of abnormal behavior dominate the weekly news. Democrats and Republicans alike, the list is endless. Bill Clinton's escapades with Monica Lewinsky, Charley Rangel's arrogant defiance of criminal investigations, toe-tapping Larry Craig's feeble attempt for a homosexual encounter in an airport bathroom stall, the list goes on and on. And what do they do when they're caught? They apologize and/or step down, usually without penalty or a slap on the wrist, pension intact.

America needs a health care bill that can be implemented without bankrupting Medicare and the citizens of this nation. How hard is that to do? I say that it's relatively easy. I would institute a national sales tax on all products sold. These monies would be used solely for financing national health care and for no other reason.

The economics are simple. Higher income people would contribute more as their finances dictate. The opposite holds true for lower income people, as they would pay less. Illegal immigrants would not be covered unless they applied for citizenship. Illegal immigrants attempting to bypass the system would be deported after their first initial treatment at any hospital emergency room. Bottom line? Everyone pays! No free rides!

Since this idea would be self-insuring, Insurance companies would participate only if their itemized bills fell in line with a prescribed range of pricing and fees as determined by a certified board of governors. This would eliminate $15 aspirin tablets and other forms of financial rape.

While my plan may need some revisions and corrections, it makes sense to me and I didn't need 1,200 pages of paper to write it on.....

Spring foward.....Fall back.....What?

Actor Peter Graves died yesterday of a heart attack outside his home in Pacific Palisades, California. Although Mr. Graves is better known to the younger crowd as the pilot in the movie "Airplane" and it's sequel, I remember him for his Golden Globe-winning portrayal of IMF leader James Phelps on the iconic spy series "Mission: Impossible". Peter Graves was 83.

The News As I See It: Former President George "Dubya" Bush, is now writing a book about his eight years in the White House. And it's green. It's entirely made out of old Al Gore ballots. There's lot of anticipation about the new book but don't worry, it'll also be available in English. A new poll shows that 22 percent of voters strongly approve of the job President Obama is doing, 43 percent strongly disapprove of the job he's doing, and the other 35 percent are holding off judgment until he actually does something.

Tiger Woods is rumored to be getting ready to return to golf. Tiger has hired Ari Fleischer, George Bush's former press secretary, to handle the press for him. I guess Ari Fleischer figures after years of trying to explain George W. Bush, Tiger's problems should be a piece of cake.

President Obama has announced this week that he has donated all of his Nobel Prize money to a charity that deals with those that have no hope: the Democratic Party. Obama would like the House to vote on his healthcare plan on either St. Patrick’s Day or the day after. That means Congress will be voting on healthcare either when they’re drunk, or when they’re hung over.

According to a survey, 67 percent of pet owners say they can understand what their pets say when they bark or meow. It doesn’t sound impressive until you realize that only five percent of Californians can understand Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Just two golfing buddies discussing the conjugation of the verb "To Be"

This Date In History: 44 B.C.; On the “Ides of March,” Julius Caesar was stabbed to death in the senate house by a group of conspirators led by Cimber, Casca, Cassius, and Marcus Junius Brutus. 1493; Christopher Columbus returned to Spain after his first visit to the Western Hemisphere. 1820; Maine became the 23rd state.

1917; Nicholas II, the last czar of Russia, is forced to abdicate his throne (March 2, old style calendar). 1937; The first hospital blood bank in the United States was established, in Chicago, at Cook County Hospital. 1965; President Lyndon Johnson asked Congress for legislation guaranteeing every American the right to vote.

2003; Hu Jintao was chosen to replace Jiang Zemin as the president of China. 2004; Scientists reported the discovery of Sedna, the most distant object in the solar system.

Picture Of The Day: A hodgepodge of pictures that I found today. As the song goes...."a little bit of this, a little bit of that" The lyrics are from "The Game Of Love" by Santana with Michelle Branch. It's song #100 on my playlist if you'd like to hear it.

The moron literally made up his own words as he trudged along.....

Printable Things I Never Told You: 1) Some days you're the pigeon; some days you're the statue. 2) My ex-girlfriend was so immature. She used to come into the bathroom and sink all my boats. 3) My right eye used to hurt every time I would drink coffee. My doctor told me to take the spoon out of the cup. 4) Fish and house guests smell after three days. 5) The principle differences between a philosophy student, an engineering student and a fine arts student is that the philosophy student asks,"Why?", the engineering student asks, "How?" and the fine arts student asks, "Do you want fries with that?".....and that's five !

Birthdays: Andrew Jackson, born in what is now generally agreed to be Waxhaw, S.C. 1767, Emil von Behring, physician 1854, Liberty Hyde Bailey, botanist 1858, Lawrence Sanders, novelist 1920, Ruth Bader Ginsburg, associate justice 1933.

The AREA 51 Retirement Home Bar and Grill: A henpecked husband was advised by a psychiatrist to assert himself. He said, "You don't have to let your wife bully you. Go home and show her you're the boss." The husband decided to take the doctor's advice.

He went home, slammed the door, shook his fist in his wife's face, and growled, "From now on you're taking orders from me. I want my supper right now, and when you get it on the table, go upstairs and lay out my clothes. Tonight I am going out with the boys."

He continued, "You are going to stay at home where you belong. Another thing, you know who is going to tie my bow tie?" His wife calmly replied, "I certainly do.....the undertaker."

It strikes me funny that the smoking man is creating a national health care bill

The Hits Just Keep On Coming: One day the teacher decides to play an animal game. She holds up a picture of a giraffe and asks if anyone knows what it is. No one raises their hand. The teacher says "See it's long neck? What animal has a long neck?" Little Linda holds up her hand and asks if it is a giraffe. The teacher replies, "Very good, Linda."

Next she holds up a picture of a zebra. None of the students hold up their hands. The teacher says, "See the stripes on this animal? What animal has stripes?" Little Julie holds up her hand and says, "It's a zebra." The teacher says, "Very good Julie."

Next she holds up a picture of a deer. None of the students recognized the animal. The teacher says, "See the big antlers on this animal. What animal has horns like this?" Still no one guesses. The teacher says, "Let me give you another hint, it's something your mother calls your father." Little Garnett shouts out, "I know what it is, it's a horny bastard."

President Barack Hussein Obama is visiting an elementary school today and he visits one of the 4th grade classes. They are in the middle of a discussion related to words and their meanings. The teacher asks the President if he would like to lead the class in the discussion of the word, "tragedy." So the president asks the class for an example of a "tragedy."

One little boy stands up and offers, "If my best friend, who lives next door, is playing in the street and a car comes along and runs him over, that would be a tragedy." Obama says, "No, that would be an accident." A little girl raises her hand and says, "If a school bus carrying 50 children drove off a cliff, killing everyone involved, that would be a tragedy." Obama explains, No, that's what we would call a great loss."

The room goes silent. No other children volunteer. President Obama searches the room and says, "Isn't there someone here who can give me an example of a tragedy?"

Finally, way in the back of the room, a boy named Jimmy raises his hand. In a quiet voice he says, "If Air Force One, carrying you, Mrs. Obama, Nancy Pelosi and other Congress members was struck by a missile and blown up to smithereens, that would be a tragedy. Obama exclaims, "That's correct. Can you tell me why that would be a tragedy?" Little Jimmy says, "Because, like you just told us, it wouldn't be an accident, and it sure as hell wouldn't be any great loss."

That's it for today my little smurfs. Remember, if it were not for Thomas Edison, we would all be watching television in the dark. More on Wednesday.

Stay Tuned !

6 comments:

  1. Thank goodness for Thomas Edison.

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  2. Amen to the title and throw your hat in:

    You got my vote!!!!!!
    I actually tried to read the House Bill on Health! Lot of references in that thing.Would be a good bet that less than 200 people other than the writers have read it. and only 6 of those reading would be congressmen!
    Jack & Sherry

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  3. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  4. Yes, I agree with Paula....thank heavens for Mr Edison! Why I couldn't even blow dry my hair if it weren't for him. Thanks for the Monday evening chuckle! Linda in Washington the state

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  5. Loved the jokes and you get my vote.

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  6. I'm voting for "Jimmy Sullivan" for President!

    Please get rid of everyone in Congress and put all new people in with brains!

    Oh, and please give me a job and health insurance too and a private jet to get around and let's not forget I need my $300. haircuts!

    Thanks Sweetie..........
    I've been with Johnny Walker tonight. He sends his best.

    Hugs, Rose

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