Back In The Day - Going To The Movies On Saturday Morning

Nearly every Saturday morning, a group us would get on our bikes and ride to the Essex movie theater, which was quite a trek (5 miles) by bicycle. We never bothered to see what was playing, because it was the only theater in town with the exception of the Circle Theater which was another 2-3 miles farther away. We would park our unlocked bikes in the bike racks and head to the show.

Most of us only had a dollar to spend, but it was only 15¢ to get in and you could buy a hot dog, a small coke and popcorn for the balance of the dollar. The neat thing was that you could practically spend your whole day there.

The first thing was always the Movie Tone News followed by the coming attractions. Next came the cartoons and there were always quite a few of them. Sometimes they'd also show "The Little Rascals" also known as "Our Gang."

After the cartoons was the "Serial" which was more or less the equivalent of watching a soap opera, because it never really ended. Just when it got to the good part, the serial would end and the movie would show parts of what would happen next week.

Finally, came the featured movie. Most of the time, they were great, usually westerns or horror movies. I watched "The Creature From The Black Lagoon" (in 3D) when it first came out and also "The Blob." Since we never knew what was going to play, I also saw "Oklahoma" and "Carousel" when they first premiered.

This was our entertainment back then and it was good! We saw the news, the cartoons, The Little Rascals, the serials and the featured movie. We ate our hot dogs and popcorn, drank our cokes.....and the best part? We parked our bikes and in those days, no one would ever think of stealing them.....

The News As I See It: In a recent interview with Univision, Obama said if there's one thing he's learned, it's that you can't change Washington from within. I guess he means that even though he had a democrat controlled house and senate in his first two years, he still couldn't effect any change and we should throw him out. Obama has gone from "Yes we can." to "Sorry, I can't."

Mitt Romney's campaign released his 2011 tax return. Democrats still want him to release all his tax returns for the last 10 years. Romney says he can't do it and he's got a good excuse. He says his dog ate them and then Obama ate the dog.

The economy is so bad, the White House is using NFL replacement refs instead of the Secret Service to guard Obama.

New documents show that Mitt Romney's campaign is $11 million in debt. First Romney's advisers had to explain that he was running out of money. Then they had to explain to him what running out of money means.

Political pundits are taking Mitt Romney to task, saying his latest gaffe was not "presidential." Vice presidential, sure. That's Joe Biden territory.

This Date In History: 1789; Congress passed the First Judiciary Act which provided for a U.S. attorney general and the Supreme Court. 1957; The Brooklyn Dodgers played their last game at Ebbets Field.

1960; The Enterprise, the first nuclear-powered aircraft carrier, was launched. 1969; The trial of the "Chicago Eight," radical antiwar and counterculture activists accused of conspiring to incite riots at the 1968 Democratic convention, began.

1991; Children's author Theodor Seuss Geisel, better known as Dr. Seuss, died at age 87. 1996; The United States and the world's other major nuclear powers signed a treaty to end all testing and development of nuclear weapons.

Picture Of The Day: "Are those the low fat walnuts?"

Printable Things I Never Told You: 1) I've been holding my stomach in for about 3 years now, so don't talk to me about dedication. 2) Las Vegas is an amazing place. Where else can you came to visit in a thirty thousand dollar car and leave in a two hundred thousand dollar bus? 3) Would it still be considered interrupting if you weren't listening in the first place?4) Women are always looking for men that are sensitive, caring and good-looking. I don't worry too much about that. Those men already have boyfriends. 5) I discovered I scream the same way whether I'm about to be devoured by a great white shark or if a piece of seaweed touches my foot.....and that's five !

Today's Horoscope: Libra - September 24th: Temperatures will rise today as you find yourself locked in a closet with a close friend who likes baked beans. Luckily, today is the best day you're going to have over the coming months, so defend yourself and foght fire with fire and let one loose yourself.

Birthdays: My sweet pal Lydia - Happy Birthday Baby! 19XX, John Marshall, American jurist, 4th Chief Justice of the United States (1801–1835) 1755, Mark Hanna, capitalist and politician 1837, F. Scott Fitzgerald, writer 1896, Jim Henson, puppeteer 1936, Phil Hartman, actor 1948, Paul and Morgan Hamm, gymnasts 1982.

The AREA 51 Retirement Home Bar And Grill: The boss arrives at the office manager desk and sees the manager sitting behind his desk totally stressed out. He advises him, "When used to have stress, I went home every afternoon for two weeks and made love to my wife. It was fantastic and it really helped, you should try it too!"

Two weeks later when the boss arrives at his office manager's desk, he sees the man happy and full of energy at his desk. The faxes are going out and the computer is running at full speed. The boss said, "I see you followed my advice?" The office manager replied, "I did! It was great! By the way, you've got a great house!"

A farmer was driving along the road with a load of horse manure. A little boy, playing in front of his house, saw him and called, "What have you got in your truck?" The farmer replied, "Horse manure."

The little boy asked, "What are you going to do with it?" The farmer said, "Put it on strawberries." The little boy said, "You ought to live here. We put sugar and cream on ours."

The Hits Just Keep On Coming: A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that her name is Patricia Whack. The frog says, "Miss Whack, I'd like to get a $30,000 loan for a vacation." Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name.

The frog says, "My name is Kermit Jagger. My dad is Mick Jagger and don't worry about the loan, I know the bank manager." Patty explains that he will need to secure the loan with some collateral. The frog says, "Sure, I have this."

He produces a tiny porcelain elephant, about an inch tall, bright pink and perfectly formed. Very confused, Patty explains that she'll have to consult with the bank manager and disappears into a back office.

She finds the manager and says, "There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000. He wants to use this as collateral."

She holds up the tiny pink elephant and says, "What in the world is this?'" The bank manager looks back at her and says, "It's a knickknack, Patty Whack. Give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone."

A woman with really hairy underarms boards a crowded bus. Unable to find a seat, she settles for hanging onto one of the poles. A drunk man next to her stares at her for three minutes, then tells her, "I love a woman that does aerobics."

The woman replies angrily, "I don't do aerobics!" The drunk man then looks at the woman and says, "Then how did you get your leg up so high?"

Mendel Rosenblatt was very old and suffering from a rare disease and could drink only human milk. Mendel asked the doctor, "How can I get human milk?" The doctor said, "Well, Ethel Goldstein just had a baby, maybe she'll help."

So every day Mendel went to Ethel's house for his daily feed. Ethel was a dark-eyed, big breasted lady, who, in spite of herself, gradually became aroused as Mendel lapped at her ripe breasts.

One day as he quietly lay sucking, she whispered to him, "Tell me Mr. Rosenblatt, do you like it?" Mendel sighed, "Mmmm, wonderful." Ethel, her lips parted and eyes aglow, said hesitantly, "Is there anything else you'd like?" Mendel replied, "As a matter of fact there is," Ruby asked breathlessly, "What?" Mendel licked his lips and said, "Maybe a little biscuit?"

That's it for today, my little cracker jacks and jills. Remember, the right to be heard does not automatically include the right to be taken seriously. That's it for now. More on Wednesday.

Stay Tuned !