Sgt Bowe Bergdahl Charged With Desertion

Army Sgt. Bowe Bergdahl, who was captured by the Taliban after abandoning his post in Afghanistan and then freed five years later in a bonehead Obama trade for five Guantanamo detainees, was charged today with desertion.

The development comes 10 months after his May 2014 release -- which initially was a joyous occasion, with his parents joining President Obama in celebrating the news in the Rose Garden.

Bob Bergdahl, who had studied Islam during his son's captivity, appeared with a full beard and read a Muslim prayer, while Bergdahl's mother Jani embraced the president.

But that euphoria quickly gave way to controversy in Washington as Bergdahl was accused of walking away from his post and putting his fellow soldiers in danger. The trade of hardened Taliban fighters for his freedom raised deep concerns on Capitol Hill that the administration struck an unbalanced and possibly illegal deal.

Military officials said Bergdahl will face in a court martial on one count of "desertion with intent to shirk important or hazardous duty," which carries a maximum of five years in prison, as well as one count of "misbehavior before the enemy, endangering the safety of a command, unit or place," which carries a maximum sentence of up to life in prison.

The charges could result in a dishonorable discharge, as well as a rank reduction and benefit removal if convicted. The case now goes to the military equivalent of a grand jury, an Article 32 hearing. If the panel approves of the charges, it will be referred to a court-martial trial.

Obama's national security adviser Susan Rice on Bergdahl: "Bowe Bergdahl served the United States with honor and distinction and he wasn't simply a hostage; he was an American prisoner of war captured on the battlefield. Certainly anybody who's been held in those conditions, in captivity for five years, has paid an extraordinary price. But that is really not the point. The point is that he's back,”

Rice told ABC host George Stephanopoulos when asked whether Bergdahl was a deserter and whether he'd face punishment. “He is going to be safely reunited with his family. He served the United States with honor and distinction. And we’ll have the opportunity eventually to learn what has transpired in the past years, but what's most important now is his health and well being, that he have the opportunity to recover in peace and security and be reunited with his family. Which is why this is such a joyous day.” (and she wonders why everyone thinks she's an asshole).

The News As I See It: Starbucks is discontinuing its "Race Together" initiative where baristas were asked to discuss race relations with customers. Apparently, there aren’t many combinations worse than "racial discussions" and "hot liquids."

Chelsea Clinton was on the Jimmy Kimmel show this week. She was there to promote the "Serve a Year" campaign. A lot of celebrities do this. They serve a year, sometimes less with good behavior.

Texas Senator Ted Cruz has officially announced that he's running for president. Cruz said that after doing exhaustive research to see if he had a real chance to win, he said, "I'm gonna run anyway."

UCLA will play Gonzaga in the NCAA tournament. Gonzaga comes from the land of imaginary schools that only exist during March Madness.

This Date In History: 1634; Maryland was founded by settlers sent by the late Lord Baltimore. 1894; Jacob Sechler Coxey and his "army" of unemployed men began their march from Ohio to Washington, DC.

1911; A fire at the Triangle Shirtwaist Co. in New York City killed 145 workers. 1931; The Scottsboro boys were arrested in Alabama. 1934; Horton Smith won the first Masters golf tournament at Augusta National in Georgia.

1957; The European Economic Community was established by the Treaty of Rome. 1965; The Alabama Freedom March, led by Martin Luther King Jr., ended its journey from Selma on the steps of the State Capitol in Montgomery, Alabama.

1975; King Faisal of Saudi Arabia was shot and killed by his nephew. 1994; U.S. troops withdrew from Somalia,

Picture Of The Day: Ten month's ago, Obama basks in the limelight of his great "accomplishment" in the freeing of Bowe Bergdahl. What say ye now, Obie?

Printable Things I Never Told You: 1) Jehovah's witnesses tell the worst knock, knock jokes. 2) If you ever get caught sleeping on the job, slowly raise your head and say, "In Jesus name, Amen". 3) I met a girl at the bar who was so self absorbed, I'll bet she doesn't even need tampons. 4) India recently launched a rocket to Mars. That's a heck of a place to put a customer service call center. 5) I get high before I get my Drivers License picture taken. That way I look normal if I'm pulled over.....and that's five !

Today's Horoscope: Aries - March 25th: Sid may be a lucky name for you this week. Sid may be a fighter pilot and he may be able to hook you up with anyone you like because he's just "that" connected. I think the name is "Sid".....now I'm unsure. What rhymes with "Sid"?

Birthdays: Arturo Toscanini, conductor 1867, Bela Bartok, composer 1881, Howard Cosell, sports commentator 1920, Simone Signoret, actress 1921, Flannery O'Connor, author 1925, Gloria Steinem, journalist and feminist 1934, Aretha Franklin, singer 1942, Elton John, musician, singer, songwriter 1947, Sarah Jessica Parker, actress 1965.

The AREA 51 Retirement Home Bar And Grill: A little girl asked her mother, "How did the human race appear?" The mother answered, "God made Adam and Eve and they had children and so was all mankind made."

Two days later, the girl asked her father the same question. The father answered, "Many years ago there were monkeys from which the human race evolved and so was all mankind made."

The confused girl returned to her mother and said, "Mom, how is it possible that you told me the human race was created by God and Dad said they developed from monkeys?"

The mother answered, "Well, dear, it is very simple. I told you about my side of the family and your father told you about his."

An elderly Italian man who lived on the outskirts of Rimini, Italy, went to the local church for confession. When the priest slid open the panel in the confessional, the man said, "Father, during World War II, a beautiful Jewish woman from our neighborhood, knocked urgently on my door and asked me to hide her from the Nazis. So I hid her in my attic."

The priest replied, "That was a wonderful thing you did, and you have no need to confess that." The man said, "There is more to tell, Father. She started to repay me with sexual favors. This happened several times a week and sometimes twice on Sundays."

The priest said, "That was a long time ago and by doing what you did, you placed the two of you in great danger, but two people under those circumstances can easily succumb to the weakness of the flesh. However, if you are truly sorry for your actions, you are indeed forgiven."

The man said, "Thank you, Father. That's a great load off my mind. I do have one more question." The priest asked, "And what is that, my son?" The man said, "Should I tell her the war is over?"

The Hits Just Keep On Coming: Dorothy and Edna, two older widows, are talking. Dorothy says, "That nice George Johnson asked me out for a date. I know you went out with him last week and I wanted to talk with you about him before I give him my answer."

Edna replied, "Well, I'll tell you. He shows up at my apartment dressed in a fine suit and he brings me beautiful flowers! Then he takes me downstairs and what's there, but a limousine. He takes me out for a champagne and lobster dinner. Then we go see a show. Let me tell you, Dorothy, I enjoyed it so much I could have just died from pleasure!"

Edna continued, "Then, we are coming back to my apartment and he turns into an animal. He tears off my expensive new dress and has his way with me two times!"

Dorothy says, "Goodness gracious! So you're telling me I shouldn't go out with him?" Edna answered "No, I'm just saying, wear an old dress."

The finals of the National Youth Poetry Contest last year came down to two finalists. One was a student going to one of the finest private schools in the nation. From an upper-crust family, he was well-bred, well-connected and all that goes with it. The other finalist was a Southern boy who was going into the 8th grade for the 3rd time.

The rules of the contest required each finalist to compose a four-line poem in one minute or less, and the poem had to contain the word "Timbuktu." The private school student went first.

About thirty seconds after the clock started he jumped up and recited the following poem:

Slowly across the desert sand
Trekked the dusty caravan.
Men on camels, two by two
Destination -- Timbuktu.

The audience went wild! How, they wondered, could the Southern boy top that?! The clock started again and the boy sat in silent thought. Finally, in the last few seconds, he jumped and recited:

Tim and me, a-huntin' went.
Met three girls in a pop-up tent.
They was three, we was two,
So I bucked one and Timbuktu.

(Girlfriend): "I finally caught you. I could hear it from the other room. You were watching porn." (Me): "No, it was just women's tennis."

That's It for today, my little polliwogs. Remember, ain't no sunshine since she's gone....or sandwiches. Ain't no sandwiches either. I'm heading over to AREA 51 for happy hour.

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More on Friday.

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