Schools Need Phys Ed Classes

Back in the day, the majority of school kids were in shape, Besides playing after school, every student had some form of organized exercise beginning in elementary school. That's one of the reasons today's kids are overweight.

The sad thing about this (besides being unhealthy) is that it has become accepted by adults and the kids. I see young kids wearing clothes or bathing suits that would have embarrassed any of us back in the day.

Besides the parents, I blame today's pathetic school system, who in their infinite wisdom and efforts to cut financial corners, have eliminated most physical activities in school. Of course, the schools have made sure that kids are politically correct and little Johnny or Jane make sure they offend no one.

The school food of today is complete crap and the government telling parents what the kids should eat to be healthy disgusts me. The truth is most kids can eat anything as long as they exercise and burn off the calories they consume.

Naturally, this would require logic, which apparently is non-existent in school government as they are busy teaching confusing new math to overweight kids who don't get it and could care less.

Fortunately, there are still a few kids with intelligent parents. These kids will move on to a better future unless of course they are of the same ilk as Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton. If that is the case, they be better off just being overweight fat kids.....

The News As I See It: Obama went to Cuba, a formerly hostile territory, last weekend . Then he returned to Washington, a currently hostile territory. Cuban President Raul Castro asked Obama to return ownership of Guantanamo Bay to Cuba. Obama agreed, but only if Cuba takes Florida.

Apple announced it’s releasing a new smaller iPhone. The iPhone is described as so small, it can fit in the palm of the hand of the child who made it.

Bernie Sanders recently spoke at the U.S.-Mexico border in Arizona and said, "we don't need a wall." Then Bernie said, "But then again, I also told Noah we didn't need an Ark, so who knows?"

Amazon has a new reality show that shadows an NFL team for an entire football season. The show follows players from the day they’re drafted all the way until the day they’re sentenced.

Debbie Wasserman Schultz denied accusations that she is taking sides in the primary election season, and said, "There is no shred of evidence to suggest that I’m favoring Hillary Clinton over Bernie Socialist.....I mean Bernie Sanders."

This Date In History: 1775; Patrick Henry declared "Give me liberty, or give me death." 1806; Lewis and Clark began their return journey east. 1919; Benito Mussolini founded his own party in Italy, the Fasci di Combattimento.

1983; U.S. President Ronald Reagan proposed a space-based missile defense system called the Strategic Defense Initiative or "Star Wars." 1998; The motion picture epic "Titanic" won 11 Oscars at the 70th Academy Awards, tying it with "Ben-Hur" for the most ever.

2001; Russia's Mir space station ended its 15-year orbit of the Earth, splashing down in the South Pacific. 2003; A U.S. Army convoy was ambushed in Iraq with 11 killed and seven captured, including Pfc. Jessica Lynch.

Picture Of The Day: Physical Education Class

Printable Things I Never Told You: 1) Starbucks should have a separate line for people who don't know what they want or how the world works. 2) If you decapitate a vegan, they can continue to talk about being a vegan for another 6 minutes. 3) "Jesus Take The Wheel" is a country music song. It was inspired by Mexicans stripping a car. It's a well-known fact that when Jesus takes the wheel, he takes the rims, tires and stereo too. 4) I'm not a racist. I hate all races equally, especially the 100 yard dash and the marathon. 5) It's unfair to put your toddler on a leash if you're not going to also let them pee on parked car tires.....and that's five !

Today's Horoscope: Aries - March 23rd: Wind directions can vary as much as the accuracy of these horoscopes, so don't panic. I would estimate that at least fifty percent of your efforts today will go, not only unrewarded, but also unnoticed.

Birthdays: John Bartram, botanist 1699, Pierre Simon Laplace, astronomer and mathematician 1749, William Smith, geologist 1769, Juan Gris, artist 1887, Erich Fromm, psychoanalyst and author 1900, Joan Crawford, actress 1908, Wernher von Braun, scientist 1912, Donald Malcolm Campbell, automobile and boat racer 1921, Roger Bannister, physician, athlete 1929.

The AREA 51 Retirement Home Bar And Grill: A man and wife are in bed and the wife says, "Honey, if I die would you get married again? Her husband replied, "No dear." His wife said, "I'm sure you would."

The annoyed husband said, "Okay, I would." The wife asked, "Would you let her sleep in our bed?" Her husband answered, "Yeah, I guess so."

The wife asked, "Would you let her wear my clothes?" Her husband replied, "No, she's thinner than you."

A priest was preparing a man for his long journey into the night. Whispering firmly, the priest said, "Denounce the devil! Let him know how little you think of his evil." The dying man said nothing.

The priest repeated his order. Still the dying man said nothing. The priest asked, "Why do you refuse to denounce the devil and his evil?"

The dying man said, "Until I know where I'm heading, I don't think I ought to aggravate anybody."

The Hits Just Keep On Coming: A woman wanted a pet so she went to the local pet shop. She looked at the dogs and the cats but finally settled on a parrot that was perched in the back of the store for $50. She asked the shopkeeper why the parrot was so cheap.

The shopkeeper said, "Well, to be honest, the bird's last owner was a madam at a whorehouse. He occasionally makes off color remarks that may offend some people."

Thinking that the price was right and she could handle anything he might say, she took him. When she got home she set the bird down on the table. He looked around and said, "New house, new madam." The woman thought, "That's not so bad."

A little while later, her daughters got home from school and the parrot spoke again, "New house, new madam, new whores." Even though she felt a little insulted, she thought that wasn't so bad either.

Later that evening, her husband Robert came home. The parrot said, "Hi Bobby!"

A guy walked into a bar and after a couple of drinks, said to the bartender, "I’ve got this great Polish joke."

The bartender glared and warned him, "Before you go telling that joke, I I think you ought to know that I’m Polish, the two bouncers on the door are Polish and most of my customers are Polish."

The guy replies, "Okay, I’ll tell it slowly."

That's it for today, my little jitterbugs. Remember, Hummingbirds are just regular birds that can't remember the lyrics. I'm heading over to AREA 51 for happy hour.

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More on Friday.

Stay Tuned !