The TAC Award Is Presented To Gary Wood

Jimmy's Journal is proud to present the TAC Award to friend and fellow blogger, Gary Wood. The TAC Award, which was created in July of 2008, is given to certain bloggers and others who make life a little bit better for all the rest of us through their contributions to the community and the blogging world. Since its inception in 2008, The TAC Award has been given five times.

Gary Wood is the newest recipient of the TAC Award. Gary is a Navy veteran and a retired police officer and the list of his contributions to his communities is lengthy.

Gary is an avid musician, singer and  guitar player. He spends quite a bit of his spare time performing with his group at local churches and retirement centers. He and his wife, Anna Mae (who Gary refers to as "My Honey"), are tireless in their efforts to give back to the community.

I'm proud to call Gary Wood my friend! You can read Gary's blog by clicking this link http://oldboomerwoodys.blogspot.com/ and tell him Jimmy sent you. Thanks for your service, Gary!

The News As I See It: The weekend was big with lots of parties! Nascar ran the big race at Talladega Super Speedway which finished with an underdog win by David Ragan, Saturday's fantastic Kentucky Derby was won by Orb, who won going away, Sunday was Cinco de Mayo and I woke up this morning with Margarita salt on my lips and wondering why my girlfriend was wearing a saddle.

Obama warned Congress not to delay the immigration reform bill and is warning Syria about the use of chemical weapons. You can tell he's getting serious because he said if they keep doing it, he'll warn them again.

It's been two years since the SEAL team busted in and got Osama bin Laden. Obama watched the raid in real time. On the night of the raid, bin Laden never knew what hit him. It's like being married to a Kardashian.

On the other hand, on the night of the Benghazi attack, Obama was last seen in the evening and not again until the morning. Maybe he recorded the attack on Tivo. He still seems to be a bit "unaware" of what actually happened. It's amazing the difference in answers during "pre-election" and post-election" times.

This Date In History: 1882; Congress passed the Chinese Exclusion Act over President Chester A. Arthur's veto. 1889 ;The Universal Exposition opened in Paris, marking the completion and dedication of the Eiffel Tower.

1937; The German airship Hindenburg blew up and burst into flames at Lakehurst, N.J. 1941; Dictator Joseph Stalin became the premier of Russia. 1954; British athlete Roger Bannister became the first person to run a mile in under four minutes (3:59:4).

1994; The Chunnel between England and France officially opened. 1999; Scotland elected its first separate parliament in three centuries.

Picture Of The Day: An original from my niece Kristi. Gotta love that face, huh?

Printable Things I Never Told You: 1) I believe that Google has this master plan of taking over the world by blackmailing everyone with their search history. 2) I'm not saying I did bad things Saturday night, but, on Sunday morning, the devil wouldn't even make eye contact. 3) Marriage controversy notwithstanding, no state should legally recognize a marriage if they don't serve alcohol at the wedding. 4) I got kicked out of the hospital Saturday night. Apparently the sign "Stroke Patients Here" meant something different. 5) In Canada, they don't count one-Mississippi's, two-Mississippi.....they count one-Saskatchewan, two Saskatchewan.....and that's five !

Today's Horoscope: Taurus - May 6th: Love is a wonderful thing that can truly change your life for the better. However, the chances of this happening to you anytime before lunch tomorrow are so remote that you might as well quit pretending that you'll find love. Go home and eat ice-cream until your brain freezes.

Birthdays: My pals Agustin and Kelly - Happy Birthday ! 19XX, Sigmund Freud, psychoanalyst 1856, Robert Peary, American arctic explorer 1856, Rudolph Valentino, actor 1895, Orson Welles, actor, director, producer 1915, Willie Mays, baseball player 1931, Tony Blair, British political leader 1953.

My Bankers

The AREA 51 Retirement Home Bar And Grill: An old man was eating in a truck stop when three bikers walked in. The first walked up to the old man, pushed his cigarette into the old man's pie and then took a seat at the counter.

The second walked up to the old man, spit into the old man's milk and then he took a seat at the counter. The third walked up to the old man, turned over the old man's plate and then he took a seat at the counter.

Without a word of protest, the old man quietly left the diner. Shortly thereafter, one of the bikers said to the waitress, "Humph, not much of a man, was he?" The waitress replied, "Not much of a truck driver either. He just backed his truck over three motorcycles."

A guy was invited to an old friend's home for dinner. His buddy preceded every request to his wife by endearing terms, calling her Honey, My Love, Darling, Sweetheart, et cetera.

The guy was impressed since he knew the couple had been married almost 70 years. While the wife was off in the kitchen he said to his buddy, "I think it's wonderful that after all the years you've been married, you still call your wife those pet names."

His buddy smiled and said, "To tell you the truth, I forgot her name about ten years ago."
 

The Hits Just Keep On Coming: My thanks to my pals Kristi and Wally for their contributions to today's stories.

An old guy goes to his doctor for his physical and gets sent to the Urologist as a precaution. When he gets there, he discovers the Urologist is a very pretty female doctor.

The female doctor says, "I'm going to check your prostate today, but this new procedure is a little different from what you are probably used to. I want you to lie on your right side, bend your knees, then while I check your prostate, take a deep breath and say, 'Ninety-nine'."

The old guy obeys and says,"99." The doctor says, "Great." Now turn over on your left side and again, while I repeat the check, take a deep breath and say, '99'." Again, the old guy says, "99."

The doctor says, "Very good. Now then, I want you to lie on your back with your knees raised slightly. I'm going to check your prostate with this hand and with the other hand I'm going to hold on to your penis to keep it out of the way. Now take a deep breath and say, '99'." The old guy says, "One...Two...Three..."

A large woman wearing a sleeveless sun dress walked into a pub in England. She raised her right arm revealing a huge, hairy armpit as she pointed to all the people sitting at the bar and asked, "What man here will buy a lady a drink?

The bar went silent as the patrons tried to ignore her. But down at the end of the bar, a bleary-eyed drunk slammed his hand down on the counter and bellowed, "Give the ballerina a drink! The bartender poured the drink and the woman chugged it down.

She turned to the patrons and again pointed around at all of them revealing the same hairy armpit and asked, "What man here will buy a lady a drink? Once again, the same little drunk slapped his money down on the bar and said, "Give the ballerina another drink!"

The bartender approached the little drunk and said, "I say, old chap, it's none of my business if you want to buy the lady a drink, but why do you keep calling her 'the ballerina' ?" The drunk replied, "Any woman who can lift her leg that high has got to be a ballerina."

That's it for today, my little polka dots. Remember, some fads breed controversy and disdain. Just like Hitler with that tiny mustache, Kim Jong-Un is ruining that haircut for everyone else.

That's it for now. More on Wednesday.

Stay Tuned !