Jammin' With The REGS BAND At Woody's West End Tavern

My Friday AREA 51 adventures took me to Woody's Tavern to see my long time friend, Scotty Migone, who I have known since he was about 14 years old. Scotty is the talented lead-guitar player for The REGS BAND who performed at that evening.

I was also fortunate to be in the company of my friends Luly, husband Paul, and Debbie. Although it's been a while since I've listened to the REGS BAND live, they never disappoint me and their performance was outstanding.

The inimitable recording artist Scotty Migone

I arrived later than intended, forgetting the fact that the Florida East Coast railway subscribes to my GPS position and makes sure that we always cross paths. I think they stop the train and wait for me, to make sure I get to count every train car ever created. They even go out of their way to back up a half mile or so, in case I lose my count. Fortunately, my friends had a table close to the band and had saved me a seat.

We were lucky to have good weather as the venue is outdoors and, although it has a roof, the damn thing leaks when it rains.

Well, the night went on and I was really enjoying the music when my pal, Johnnie Walker Black, thought it would be a good idea to sit in with the band. Fortunately, Scotty knew the song I had in mind so.....I sat in. Onstage, I realized the key was too low for me, so I asked Scotty to change the key.

After a bit of fumbling, I got in sync with the band and we finished fairly strong. Sitting in with a live band and performing an unrehearsed number is no piece of cake, but when you're playing with pros, it doesn't take long to get on track.

After the last set, I got to spend time with Scotty, the band, and another old friend, Danny. In music, timing is everything and right after the set, there was a brief, but heavy thunderstorm. Just enough to cool the evening.....

The News As I See It: Obama recently announced that the U.S. will lead a huge multinational coalition to fight the terror groups in Iraq. Of course, most people just turned it off because they thought it was a rerun. In his big speech, he outlined his plan to quote "degrade and ultimately destroy" the terror group ISIS. When asked how, he said, "I’ll build their website."

British Prime Minister David Cameron went to Scotland this week to persuade citizens of the country to vote "no" on leaving the U.K. He said, “It's never worked out for anyone....well, except for America, Canada, Australia, India, and....never mind!

Obama announced in his speech the other night that he's sending 475 military advisers to Iraq. He's also sending 475 military advisers to the NFL. In his speech he also announced that he's counting on the support of an international coalition. Right now, we can't get the support of the International House of Pancakes.

When asked about the more than 1,000 US soldiers in Iraq, he replied, "They are advisers, not 'boots on the ground'. Besides, they don't count, they're wearing hush-puppies."

You know who's upset now with ISIS? Al-Qaida. It's because ISIS is getting more attention than al-Qaida. So now, next Saturday night will be Ayman al-Zawahiri bobblehead night.

This Date In History: 1789; The U.S. Department of Foreign Affairs changed its name to the Department of State. 1821; Costa Rica, Guatemala, Honduras, Nicaragua, and El Salvador gained independence. 1835; Charles Darwin and the HMS Beagle reached the Galapagos Islands.

1917; Alexander Kerensky proclaimed Russia a republic. 1935; The Nuremberg Laws deprived Jews of their citizenship and made the Swastika the official emblem of Nazi Germany. 1963; A church bombing in Birmingham, Alabama, killed four young black girls.

1989; Pulitzer Prize-winning author Robert Penn Warren, the first poet laureate of the United States, died. 2004; The National Hockey League lockout began. The 2004-2005 season would ultimately be canceled.

Picture Of The Day: A great night of fun with good friends and listening to the REGS BAND at Woody's Tavern in Miami Springs.

Printable Things I Never Told You: 1) I'm far less concerned with who let it out. I'm more curious as to why the damned cat was in the bag in the first place? 2) A murder of crows, a troop of monkeys, a pod of dolphins.....a herpe of Kardashians. 3) I'm sorry to hear your uncle was run over by a boat in Venice. My gondolences. 4) I'm not saying that her pants were too tight. I'm just saying that they wont fit if she misses a day of shaving her legs. 5) According to my Google history, I spent most of last Saturday night drinking scotch and trying to buy a llama.....and that's five !

Today's Horoscope: Virgo - September 15th: "Pride goeth before the fall." This never happens if you remember the number one rule when socializing: "When in doubt, use the bar stool as a walker." Hit the wine slowly 'cause you know how you get. No chance of rain and a good chance of romance, especially if you finish the wine. Your choice of shoes may affect the evening.

Birthdays: My high school friend Gene and my former secretary and cherished friend Miriam - Happy Birthday 19XX, François de La Rochefoucauld, writer 1613, James Fenimore Cooper, American novelist 1789,  William Howard Taft, 27th president of the United States 1857, Bruno Walter, conductor 1876, Agatha Christie, story writer 1890, Jean Renoir, film director, writer 1894, Oliver Stone, filmmaker 1946, Dan Marino, NFL quarterback 1961.

The AREA 51 Retirement Home Bar And Grill: An older professor concluded his lecture on "The Art of Observation" with a note of caution, "You don’t want to try these techniques at home." Somebody from the audience asked, "Why not?"

The old man said, "I watched my wife’s routine at breakfast for years. She made lots of trips between the refrigerator, stove, table and cabinets, often carrying a single item at a time. One day I told her, 'Hon, why don’t you try carrying several things at once?'"

The person in the audience asked, "Did it save time?" The old man said, "Actually, yes. It used to take her 20 minutes to make breakfast. Now I do it in seven."

A married couple was in a terrible accident where the woman's face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn't graft any skin from her body because she was too thin.

So the husband offered to donate some of his own skin. However, the only skin on his body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from his ass.

The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and they requested that the doctor also honor their secret.

After the surgery was completed, everyone was astounded at the woman's new face. She looked more beautiful than she ever had before! All her friends and relatives just went on and on about her youthful beauty!

One day, she was alone with her husband and she was overcome with emotion at his sacrifice. She said, "Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you did for me. How can I possibly repay you?" He replied, "My darling, I get all the thanks I need every time I see your mother kiss you on the cheek."

The Hits Just Keep On Coming: My thanks to my friend Carole for her contribution to today's stories.

During a good manners and etiquette class being held for young children, the teacher says to her students, "If you were courting a well educated young girl from a prominent family and during a dinner for two you needed to go to the toilet, what would you say to her?"

Mike replies, "Wait a minute, I’m going to take a piss." The teacher says, "That would be very rude and improper on your part."

Charlie answers, "I’m sorry I need to go to the toilet, I’ll be back in a minute." The teacher says, "That’s much better but to mention the word 'toilet' during a meal, is unpleasant."

Little Johnny says, "My dear, please excuse me for a moment. I have to go shake hands with a personal friend who I hope to be able to introduce to you after dinner."

Three little boys were concerned because they couldn't get anyone to play with them. They decided it was because they had not been baptized and didn't go to Sunday School. So they went to the nearest church. Only the janitor was there.

One little boy said to the janitor, "We need to be baptized because no one will come out and play with us. Will you baptize us?" The janitor said, "Sure." He took them into the bathroom and dunked their heads in the toilet bowl, one at a time. Then he said, "Now go out and play."

When they got outside, dripping wet, one of them asked, "What religion do you think we are?" The oldest one said, "We're not Kathlick, because they pour the water on you. We're not Babtis, because they dunk all of you in the water. We're not Methdiss, because they just sprinkle you."

The littlest one said, "Didn't you smell that water!" The oldest one said, "Yeah!" The littlest one asked, "What do you think that means?" The oldest boy replied, "I think it means we're Pisscopalians."

That's it for today, my little aardvarks. Remember, do not worry about global warming and social security. The real crisis is the day elderly people learn how to text while driving.

More on Wednesday.

Stay Tuned !