Tragedy

While the severity and sadness of the missing Malaysian airliner remains, the actions of the Malaysian government has turned this disaster into somewhat of a sideshow. Politics, compounded by
the local press, has made matters worse.

The world press, especially United States television has turned this crisis into a television ratings race. CNN, whose ratings continue to plummet has turned the disaster into a 24 hour per day subject.

Additionally, all of the television coverage seems to be somewhat contrasted with each channel stating their own facts be they correct or not.

Perhaps a day will come when the world community concentrates on the task at hand and leaves ideology and politics on the sidelines, especially during crises like this.

The News As I See It: Yesterday was the first day of spring and just in time, because the day before yesterday was the 400th day of winter.

The standoff in Ukraine keeps getting worse. But a new poll shows Vladimir Putin's approval rating has actually gone up 10 percent since he sent troops into Crimea. When he heard that, Obama just shrugged and sent troops to invade Canada.

Obama released his March Madness bracket this morning, picking Michigan State to win the tournament. In response, Vladimir Putin started moving troops into Gonzaga.

Starbucks is coming out with a new tea inspired by Oprah Winfrey. In a related story, they're also coming out with a cup holder inspired by Stedman.

Oprah Winfrey sold her old studio, Harpo Studios, apparently because she's decided to get rid of things she doesn't use anymore. Next up, Stedman.

This Date In History: 1602; The Dutch East India Company was established. During its 196-year history, it became one of the world's most powerful companies. 1727; English physicist/astronomer Sir Isaac Newton died in London at age 84.

1852; Harriet Beecher Stowe's "Uncle Tom's Cabin" was published. 1969; John Lennon married Yoko Ono in Gibraltar. 1985; Libby Riddles became the first woman to win the Iditarod. 1990; Namibia becomes an independent nation.

1995; Two members of the Japanese cult Aum Sinrikyo released poisonous gas in a Tokyo subway stop during rush hour, killing 12 people and sending over 5,000 to the hospital for treatment.

1999; Bertrand Piccard and Brian Jones became the first to fly a hot-air balloon nonstop around the world. 2003; Ground troops entered Iraq and a second round of air strikes against Baghdad was launched.

Picture Of The Day: The heartbreak of the families.

Printable Things I Never Told You: 1) My neighbors' headboard banging kept me up last night so I yelled, "The guy last night made her scream louder." Then it got quiet.... 2) I was helping my nephew study for his geology exam, and apparently "hard, classic and punk" aren't the 3 different types of rock. Who knew? 3) People who ask themselves what Jesus would do seem to forget just how badly things worked out for him. 4) I'm Lactose Intolerant, which means I rarely find missing children. 5) Some woman was staring at the beer in my cup holder, like she's never seen a cup holder on a grocery cart before.....and that's five !

Today's Horoscope: Aries - March 21th: Love hides in strange places and could be waiting for you at some of the strangest places you've ever imagined. On the other hand, it could be hidden in a pantry, bound and gagged. There are some strange things that go on in pantries. I know, I've been thee.

Birthdays: My friend Randy - Happy Birthday buddy 19XX, Henrik Ibsen, Norwegian dramatist and poet 1828, Frederick W. Taylor, industrial engineer 1856, B. F. Skinner, psychologist 1904, Alfonso Garcia Robles, statesman, Nobel Prize winner 1911, Carl Reiner, actor, writer, director 1922, Fred Rogers, television personality 1928, Bobby Orr, hockey player 1948, William Hurt, actor 1950, Spike Lee, filmmaker 1957, Holly Hunter, actress 1958.

The AREA 51 Retirement Home Bar And Grill: A lawyer boarded an airplane in New Orleans with a box of frozen crabs and asked a blonde flight attendant to take care of them for him. She took the box and promised to put it in the crew's refrigerator.

He advised her that he was holding her personally responsible for them staying frozen, mentioning in a very haughty manner that he was a lawyer and proceeded to rant at her about what would happen if she let them thaw out. Needless to say, she was annoyed by his behavior.

Shortly before landing in New York , she used the intercom to announce to the entire cabin, "Would the lawyer who gave me the crabs in New Orleans please raise your hand?" Not one hand went up, so she took them home and ate them.

Two lessons to be learned here: 1) Lawyers aren't as smart as they think they are. 2) Blondes aren't as dumb as most folk think.

A blonde and a brunette are running a ranch together in Louisiana. They decide they need a bull to mate with their cows to increase their herd. The brunette takes their life savings of $600 dollars and goes to Texas to buy a bull.

She eventually meets with an old cowboy that will sell her a bull. "It's the only one I got for $599, take it or leave it." She buys the bull and goes to the local telegram office and says, "I'd like to send a telegram to my friend in Louisiana that says: Have found the stud bull for our ranch, bring the trailer."

The man behind the counter tells her, "Telegrams to anywhere in the U.S. are $.75 per word." She thinks about it for a moment and decides. "I'd like to send one word, please." The man inquires, "And what word would that be?" The brunette replies, "Comfortable." The man asks, "I'm sorry miss, but how is your friend gonna understand this telegram?" The brunette replies, "My friend is blonde and reads real slow, when she gets this, she will see 'Com-for-da-bull'."
 

The Hits Just Keep On Coming: One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head.

She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?" Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white."

The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, "Momma, how come all of grandma's hairs are white?"

Three little boys were concerned because they couldn't get anyone to play with them. They decided it was because they had not been baptized and didn't go to Sunday School. So they went to the nearest church. Only the janitor was there.

One little boy said, "We need to be baptized because no one will come out and play with us. Will you baptize us?" The janitor said, "Sure." He took them into the bathroom and dunked their heads in the toilet bowl, one at a time. Then he said, "Now go out and play."

When they got outside, dripping wet, one of them asked, "What religion do you think we are?" The oldest one said, "We're not Kathlick, because they pour the water on you. We're not Babtis, because they dunk all of you in the water. We're not Methdiss, because they just sprinkle you."

The littlest one said, "Didn't you smell that water!" The oldest replied, "Yeah!" The littlest one asked,"What do you think that means?" The oldest one replied, "I think it means we're Pisscopalians."

That's it for today, my little whippoorwills. Remember, if you listen real closely, you can hear your alarm clock laughing as you set it. I'll be in AREA 51 for happy hour.

Have a great weekend and more on Friday.

Stay Tuned !