Commercials That Are beginning To Irritate Me !

While watching the latest Jackie Chan movie last night I wondered why you never see any Chinese men nicknamed Rusty. Things like this occasionally pass through my mind on Hump Day's Eve and it always reminds me of the fact that I really need to get out of the house more often. Fortunately, Wednesday nights are always my mid-week excuse to go to happy hour in AREA 51 and hang out with my pals and tonight will be no exception.

From The Commercials I'm Beginning To Hate Department:

I'm starting to believe that advertisers must assume that anyone watching television past 12:00 at night are complete morons. That's either true or the advertisers for late night television are morons themselves. It's insulting to watch all of the ambulance chasing attorneys shlock their various firms, encouraging anyone who will listen to file a law suit against anybody for any reason and hoping that they can find a case that they can milk to the "nth" degree.

Of course, there's always the free credit report.com companies that tell you that unless you purchase their service (oh yeah, it's not really free), you will never be able to get credit or find a job and there's a 50-50 chance you will become constipated. What they neglect to tell you is that all credit report companies are required by law to give you a yearly free credit report (upon written request).

I'm even further agitated by the latest commercial from a company that urges you to get rid of your "unwanted or unused" gold (?) by sending it (in the mail) to Murray Goldsilverberg and they will send you cash (as opposed to green stamps). They "eliminate" the middle man by melting the gold in their own "refinery" (located in the garage behind the Goldsilverberg home in Yonkers, New York).

What's even sadder is that I'm relatively sure that the two ugly women attesting to the validity of the offer are his wife and daughter (God forbid). Either they're his family or he has a poor sense of the definition of acting.

Last evening I saw at least three commercials hawking some inane, idiotic product and urging you to call NOW and be the among the first 72,350 callers and they will double your order. "Yes folks, you can order this handy dandy, deluxe key chain with the attached beer can opener and penlight for the low, low price of....... (you guessed it) $19.95. A $743 dollar value (who decides what the real value is?), this product is yours for only $19.95. Call now while supplies last."

Opportunists......ya gotta really love 'em even if you're the 72,351st caller and they don't double your order.

This Date In History 1833; In the greatest meteor storm in recorded history, the annual Leonid meteor shower unexpectedly turns into a storm of up to 40 meteors per second, causing panic throughout the eastern United States. 1948; In the final session of the International Military Tribunal for the Far East, in Tokyo, seven war criminals, including former Japanese leader Hideki Tojo, are sentenced to death. 1980; Voyager 1, the first space probe to travel through the Saturnian system, comes within 78,000 miles of Saturn, its closest encounter with the gas planet.

Picture Of The Day It's getting closer and closer to ski season and my thoughts often wander to Heavenly Valley at Lake Tahoe, Nevada. Located on the California-Nevada state line, it is probably one of the most beautiful areas in the world. I have skied that area many times in the past and the great thing about Tahoe is that you can return home to your room in Caesars Palace and enjoy the casinos, shows and nightlife.

Birthdays: Auguste Rodin, French sculptor 1840, Lord Rayleigh, mathematician and physicist 1842, Grace Kelly, American film actress 1929, Neil Young, Canadian singer, songwriter, and guitarist 1945.

The Hits Just Keep On Coming

A farmer was driving along the road with a load of horse manure. A little boy, playing in front of his house, saw him and called, "What've you got in your truck?" The farmer replied, "Horse manure." The little boy asked, "What are you going to do with it?" The farmer said, "Put it on strawberries." The little boy said, "You ought to live here, we put sugar and cream on ours."

An old man in the nursing home got a bottle of wine for his birthday. He talked the old lady in the next room into sharing it with him. After they were both totally bombed, he started groping the old lady and pulling at her clothes. He managed to get her blouse and bra off before she stopped him. She said, "I can't do this, I have acute angina". The old guy says "God, I hope so, 'cause you've got the ugliest tits I've ever seen."

I spend a lot of time on my computer but I hope I always remember when to get up a take a break...

That's it for today my little cracker jacks and jills. More On Friday.

Stay Tuned !