Wednesday, September 4, 2013
Life's A Bitch And Then You Die
Ariel Castro is dead. I could care less! The cost of keeping his sorry ass alive is paid for by tax payers and we just saved a ton of money. Convicted of kidnapping and raping three women, as well as murder, Castro committed suicide in his prison cell Tuesday night.
Castro held three women in his Cleveland home for about a decade. He hanged himself with a bedsheet. He was being held at the Correctional Reception Center in Orient.
Prison medical staff tried to revive him but failed. Castro was taken to The Ohio State University Wexner Medical Center, where he was pronounced dead at 10:52 p.m. Life's a bitch and then you die.
Labor Day turned out to be a rather extended afternoon barbecue and party for me and afterward, I decided a nap was in order. I awoke from my nap Tuesday morning at 4 am, thus eliminating any chance to publish my journal on Monday.
That said, you may notice that I am publishing "This Date In History" and "Birthdays" for both Monday and today.
The News As I See It: Obama is trying to get congressional approval before we attack Syria. And if that works, there’s talk we might even consider bringing back the rest of the Constitution.
Obama is pretty clever. Did you see what he is doing to get Congress to approve the attack? He told them Syrian President Assad supports Obamacare.
John McCain was caught playing poker on his smartphone during the hearing on Syria. I thought, "John McCain knows how to use a smartphone?"
Diana Nyad swam from Cuba to Florida without using a shark cage. She swam all the way from Cuba to Miami......accompanied by five Cuban baseball pitchers. It took endurance, perseverance and some pretty lazy sharks.
About $30 million in $100 bills had to be destroyed because of a printing problem. Isn't that unbelievable? The only thing we know how to do right in this country is print money and we screw that up.
They're making the first smartphone that's not made overseas in Texas. It's also the first smartphone that doubles as a handgun.
Leaders from the NAACP met with leaders from the KKK. After seven hours of talks both sides agreed that they don't really care for Bryant Gumbel.
This Date In History:
September 2nd: 1666; The great fire of London broke out, destroying much of the city, including St. Paul's Cathedral. 1789; The U.S. Treasury Department was established.
1901; Vice President Theodore Roosevelt gave his "speak softly and carry a big stick" speech, regarding foreign policy, at the Minnesota State Fair.
1945; Japan's formal surrender in World War II was celebrated as Victory over Japan (V-J) Day. 1945; Ho Chi Minh declared Vietnam an independent republic.
1963; Alabama governor George Wallace prevented the racial integration of Tuskegee High School by encircling the building with state troopers. 1969; North Vietnamese president Chi Minh died.
September 4th 1781; The city of Los Angeles was founded by Spanish settlers. 1888; George Eastman patented his roll-film camera and registered the Kodak trademark.
1951; President Harry S. Truman inaugurated transcontinental television service in the U.S. when AT&T carried his address to the opening session of the Japanese Peace Convention in San Francisco.
1957; Nine black students attempted to enter Little Rock's Central High School but were blocked by the National Guard. Arkansas governor Orval Faubus had summoned the federal troops.
1972; U. S. swimmer Mark Spitz won a record seventh gold medal at the Munich Summer Olympics
Picture Of The Day: Domino the cat.....
Printable Things I Never Told You: 1) I don't always drink tequila but when I do, I always wonder where the hell are my car keys and clothes? 2) She said, "I am Mother, hear me roar".....as her kids flew a kite made out of her granny panties down the street. 3) We should really thank our Dads for bringing us into this world since our Moms were probably tired and not in the mood. 4) I've removed swimming with dolphins from my bucket list, mainly because I don't swim well and drowning with dolphins doesn't have quite the same appeal. 5) If a tree falls in the woods, it should break into a light jog so it looks like it did it on purpose.....and that's five !
Today's Horoscope: Virgo - September 4th: Seek solace in the bosom of a loved one. If your loved one has a particularly ample bosom, be aware that there might be others already in there.
September 2nd; Liliuokalani, last reigning queen of the Hawaiian Islands 1828, Wilhelm Ostwald physical chemist 1853, Andrew Grove engineer, technology executive 1936, Peter V. Ueberroth businessman 1937, Terry Bradshaw football quarterback 1948, Christa McAuliffe teacher 1948, Keanu Reeves actor 1964 Salma Hayek actress 1966
September 4th; Francois Rene Chateaubriand, writer 1768, Donald McKay, shipbuilder 1810, Anton Bruckner, composer 1824, Mary Renault, novelist 1905, Mitzi Gaynor, actress, dancer 1931, Ray Floyd, golfer 1942, Tom Watson, golfer 1949, Beyonce Knowles, singer, dancer, actor 1981.
AREA 51 Retirement Home Bar And Grill: An elderly couple were driving across the country. The woman was driving when she got pulled over by the highway patrol. The officer said, "Ma'am did you know you were speeding?" The woman, hard of hearing, turns to her husband and asks, "What did he say?" The old man yells, "He says you were speeding!"
The patrolman says, "May I see your license?" The woman turns to her husband and asks again, "What did he say?" The old man yells, "He wants to see your license!" The woman gave the officer her license.
The patrolman says, "I see you are from Arkansas. I spent some time there once and went on a blind date with the ugliest woman I've ever seen." The woman turned to her husband and asked, "What did he say?" The old man yells, "He said he knows you!"
Miss Bea, the church organist, was in her eighties and had never been married. She was much admired for her sweetness and kindness to all. The pastor came to call on her one afternoon early in the spring and she welcomed him into her Victorian parlor. She invited him to have a seat while she prepared a little tea.
As he sat facing her old pump organ, the young minister noticed a cut glass bowl sitting on top of it, filled with water. In the water floated, of all things, a condom. Imagine his shock and surprise. Imagine his curiosity! Surely Miss Bea had flipped or something!
When she returned with tea and cookies, they began to chat. The pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of water and its strange floater, but soon it got the better of him, and he could resist no longer. "Miss Bea," he said, "I wonder if you would tell me about this?" (pointing to the bowl).
Miss Bea replied, "Oh, yes, isn't it wonderful? I was walking downtown last fall and I found this little package on the ground. The directions said to put it on the organ, keep it wet and it would prevent disease. And you know, I haven't had a cold all winter."
The Hits Just Keep On Coming: The Sierra Club and the U.S. Forest Service were presenting an alternative to a group of Wyoming ranchers for controlling the coyote population.
It seems that after years of the ranchers using the tried and true methods of shooting or trapping the predators, these two groups were offering a "more humane" solution.
What they proposed was for the animals to be captured alive, the males would then be castrated and turned loose again. Thus the population would be controlled.This was actually proposed to the Wyoming Wool and Sheep Grower's Association by the Sierra Club and the U.S.F.S.
The ranchers listened to the presentation and then sat there in a sort of dumb-found silence, trying to make sense of the amazing proposal they had just heard.
Finally, an old boy in the back of the conference room stood up, tipped his hat back and said, "Son, I don't think you understand our problem. Those coyotes ain't screwin' our sheep - they're eatin' 'em!"
How To Start Each Day With A Positive Outlook:
1. Open a new folder in your computer.
2. Name it "Barack Obama".
3. Send it to the Recycle Bin.
4. Empty the Recycle Bin.
5. The PC will ask: ‘Do you want to get rid of "Barack Obama?"
6. Firmly Click "Yes."
7. Feel better? Good! – Tomorrow we’ll do Nancy Pelosi.
While acquainting himself with a new elderly female patient, the doctor asked, "How long have you been bed-ridden?" After a look of complete confusion she answered, "Why, not for about twenty years.....when my husband was alive."
That's it for today, my little apple tarts. Remember, bragging about how much you receive in alimony only demonstrates how much someone was willing to pay to get rid of you. I'm heading over to AREA 51 for happy hour.
More on Friday.
Stay Tuned !