Friday, March 27, 2009

Who Can Find Time To Run The Government When You're Busy Making Television Appearances?

It's a new day and age and the Presidency of the United States has taken on a whole new look. The Chief Dude now appears on daily television in his quest to "Change" America. The normal Saturday radio address was held on You Tube. He appeared on the the Tonight Show with Jay Leno, he had a virtual Town Hall Meeting, not to mention his constant daily CNN News Conferences. This is probably going to get funnier as I expect to see him soon featured on "Dancing With The Stars" and entering in the Bass Fishing Tournaments on ESPN.

What he should be doing is making an appearance at the U.S. - Mexico border along with 10,000 American troops and stop the drug dealers from infiltrating America and shooting anything that moves. What he should be doing is cracking down on corporations like Microsoft from shipping "low paying" jobs to India. What he should be doing is explaining how giving away money to people who sit on their asses and complain, will not further burden the U.S. tax payer and the economy.

The current bailout mess notwithstanding, we've just finished eight years under the rein of George "Dubya" Bush, a C-average college student who couldn't even properly speak the English language. After eight years of this nimrod running the show, we now have a president who wants to take the money of hard working middle class taxpayers and "spread the wealth" (read give it to the "poor").

Sorry, but I worked hard for my money, and I never received unemployment checks, food stamps or welfare, even though there were times I could have used the help. My parents nor my grandparents ever received any type of help either. When you have generations of families receiving this type of aid, something is wrong with the picture. This type of financial aid was intended to be temporary, not multi-generational.

It boggles my mind how America is run by either left wing or right wing parties, whose "me first" mentality seems oblivious to the needs of the other party. In the interim, these parties and the type of government they represent is funded mostly by "middle of the road", hard working tax payers. I am further amazed at the fact that there is not a Centrist or "middle of the road" party as an alternative to the left and right wing parties.

I can assure you that the minds of most Americans, given the choice of three equally funded and represented parties, would choose the middle of the road. Until this comes to pass, the government will always be headed by idiots who only think of themselves and their party first.

Today's Friday and I'm going to AREA 51 for some rest and recreation. After the news this week, it's time to party with my pals and nothing is more relaxing than to hang out and enjoy the company of my pal, Johnnie walker Black and enjoy the evening.

This Date In History: 1899; Guglielmo Marconi, a pioneer of wireless communications, transmits a radio telegraphy signal between England and France. 1958; Nikita Khrushchev becomes prime minister of the Soviet Union. 1973; Marlon Brando refuses his Oscar for The Godfather in protest at Hollywood's treatment of Native Americans.

Picture Of The Day: Although today's theme is obvious, I have to allow a break in the theme in order to show this picture of Valerie Bertinelli, age 48, on the cover of People magazine. Ms. Bertinelli, who has been fighting a weight problem for years, has lost 50 pounds and is shown here sporting her new look and this boy likes it!

Birthdays: My pal, Jackie's birthday is on Sunday, so happy Birthday my love 19XX, Wilhelm Conrad Roentgen, German physicist 1845, Gloria Swanson, Hollywood actress 1897, James Callaghan, British prime minister 1912, Cyrus Vance, US secretary of state 1917, Sarah Vaughan, American jazz singer and pianist 1924, Quentin Tarantino, film director, screenwriter, and actor 1963.

Printable Things I Never Told You: 1) It's scary when you start making the same noises as your coffeemaker. 2) My first "official" date was in the fifth grade and I took a lovely young lass named Janice to the movies. We're still in touch via the Internet. 3) On New Years Day in 1963, my mom asked me if I had been drinking the previous evening. I told her no and she asked me why I kissed my dog Beanie on the nose when I got home. I asked her when she began working for the local newspaper. 4) My mother started walking 5 miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 now and we have no idea where she is! 5) A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.

The Hits Just Keep On Coming:

A henpecked husband was advised by a psychiatrist to assert himself. The psychiatrist said, "You don't have to let your wife bully you. Go home and show her you're the boss." The husband decided to take the doctor's advice.

He went home, slammed the door, shook his fist in his wife's face, and growled, "From now on you're taking orders from me. I want my supper right now, and when you get it on the table, go upstairs and lay out my clothes. Tonight I am going out with the boys. You are going to stay at home where you belong. Another thing, you know who is going to tie my bow tie?"His wife responded, "Yeah, I sure do, the undertaker."

Five surgeons are discussing who makes the best patients to operate on. The first surgeon says, "I like to see accountants on my operating table, because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered." The second responds, "Yeah, but you should try electricians. Everything inside them is color coded."

The third surgeon says, "No, I really think librarians are the best; everything inside them is in alphabetical order." The fourth surgeon chimes in, "You know, I like construction workers. They always understand when you have a few parts left over at the end and when the job takes longer than you said it would."

The fifth surgeon shuts them all up when he observes, "The French are the easiest to operate on. There's no guts, no heart, no balls and no spine. Plus the head and ass are interchangeable.

A study conducted by UCLA's Department of Psychiatry has revealed that the kind of male face that a woman finds attractive can differ depending on where she is in her menstrual cycle. For instance, if she is ovulating she is attracted to men with rugged and masculine features.

However, if she is menstruating, or menopausal, she is more prone to be attracted to a man with scissors lodged in his temple and a bat jammed up his ass while he is on fire. Further studies are expected.

That's it for today my little doodle bugs. Have a great weekend and more on Monday.

Stay Tuned !


Coelha :B said...

Valerie looks amazing!! Gives me hope! :) Julie

Rose said...

If Valerie can do it, I can....but I don't have Valerie's checkbook or personal assistance either....but I'll give it a good try.


Anonymous said...

I hate to be a downer on Val, but I remember her in the past admitting she'd used drugs over and over for weight loss. I just find it hard to believe some Jenny Criag food whipped her into lasting shape. It may be true, but at 48 being a yo you dieter her whole life, and using drugs for weight loss in the past, it is hard for me to believe she did not use them again.

I've been hearing a lot about how Obama loves Tv & the limelight, but I have to say, most "public" people do, no matter what they say. But we have some very serious issues that can't be solved on TV. ~Mary

Julie said...

I told Valarie not to use me as her body double, they never listen... love your rant and jokes today.

Linda's World said...

Yup, it seems like he's on TV every 5 minutes. Well, I hope he's enjoying himself. Have a good weekend. Linda in WA

Dirk said...

I had commented on this in another blog. I have never seen a sitting President on late-night TV in my life. I read today that he is now sending teams of campaign workers door-to-door to try to sell his massive budget to the American public. That's not a leader at all. If he's going to lead, he needs to lead instead of continuing the campaign.


Paula said...

I say good for your Mom.

Pat said...

Hi Jimmy!
Stopping by to say hello. I really should leave comments more, I'm so bad at this, I always read your posts though and can alays be guaranteed a laugh to start my day!
Loved the donkey joke!

JOHNSWORLD08 said...

Ive always liked Valerie. And I heard that the President was laughing all thru his speech on our recession.Stop by when you can.

Senorita said...

I am totally on board with this posting, and agree with everything you wrote on this posting. Given the opportunity I would've chosen the candidate in the middle. I didn't like Dubya in office, and I have to say that I am not really happy with the decisions that Obama has been making.

I think that him as a democrat putting his focus on the border issue would be very politically incorrect.

Lately the border has been a hot topic for immigration, not drug issues, when I really think it's been about drugs and terrorism all along.

Pamela said...

I got real angry when I found out he came out here to be on Jay Leno! Imagine the costs associated with bringing him out here for that! Ridicules!!
Good for Valerie. I'm jealous as HELL now! LOL!

mxmotomom said...

Hello Jimmy,
Pam and I were talking on the phone yesterday for 2 hours and I said I need some journals to read!!! She said "Kendra, you would LOVE Jimmy!!!"
and she is right...
Area 51... I LOVE it...
Jimmy you HAVE to be a coasttocoastam guy?
Hugs Kendra

Joann said...

I SOOO agree with this entry!! It makes me so angry to think of all the AMERICAN jobs in other countries. If we brought those jobs back, that would almost totally fix this stupid recession.

And I think that there should be an ABSOLUTE MAXIMUM amount of time anyone (except those TRULY disabled) can recieve FREE living expenses, AND they should have to be DRUG TESTED every few weeks. Can you imagine how much money this country would SAVE by all those failing a mandatory drug test to get their gov't assistance check??

Joann said...

Oh yeah... and I want to look like Valerie when I'm 48!! Hey, it COULD happen!!