Wednesday, January 7, 2015

Two Arrested, One Dead Following French Terrorist Attack

One terror suspect is dead and two are in custody after an assault on Charlie Hebdo, a satirical French newspaper in which 12 people were murdered. Brothers Said Kouachi, 34, and Sherif Kouachi, 32 and 18-year-old homeless man Hamid Mourai, all French citizens of Algerian descent, were previously named by French authorities, but it is not clear if they were part of this police action.

Arrests in Reims, a Paris suburb, were initially confirmed to the Guardian by a French police spokesperson. Authorities previously said the suspects fled to the small city, about 90 miles from Paris, but it is not clear if that is where the arrests occurred. A senior U.S. official confirmed the arrests to NBC News, but no location information was provided.

Investigators quickly identified the brothers because they left their identification cards behind when fleeing the stolen black Citroen they have been seen utilizing in video of the assault, according to TFI.

Terrorism is beginning to take it's toll on the world. One thing is evident, sooner or later people are going to take matters into their own hands and there will be a price to pay. The barbaric attack today in Paris is a prime example.

It only goes to show that governments are spending to much time dilly-dallying with politically correct answers when the bottom line is that violence will only be stopped when met with violence. Sometimes it is the only reaction that these people will understand.

On average, an American man under 75 will have sex two to three times a week, where as a Japanese man the same age will have sex only one or two times a year. This is very upsetting news to most of my friends, as they had no idea they were Japanese.

The News As I See It: Joe Biden went to Brazil in an effort to try and repair America's relationship with their government. Biden said, "It's great to be here in the Amazon. I've always wanted to see where all the books come from."

Democratic Senator Harry Reid is expected to make a full recovery after he was exercising with a resistance band that snapped, causing him to fall. The good news is he's fine. The bad news is there's no video of it.

At the Cowboys football game last weekend, Chris Christie was hugging Jerry Jones. It was right after Jones said, "C'mon Chris, let's get some hot wings."

I started taking down my Christmas decorations. Whenever I take the tree down, I can't re-tangle the lights the way they were.

This Date In History: 1896; Fanny Farmer published her first cookbook. 1927; Transatlantic commercial telephone service began between New York and London. 1953; Harry Truman announced that the U.S. had developed the hydrogen bomb.

1955; Marian Anderson made her Metropolitan Opera debut. 1979; Vietnamese forces captured the Cambodian capital of Phnom Penh, overthrowing Pol Pot's Khmer Rouge government.

1989; Japan's Emperor Hirohito died. 1999; The impeachment trial of President William Clinton began in the Senate.

Picture Of The Day: The brazen terrorists evidently weren't very smart. They left their identification behind when they fled.

Printable Things I Never Told You: 1) Give a man a fish and he can eat for a day. Teach a 4 year old how to turn on the TV and you can sleep for an extra hour. 2) I went to the doctor because of water on the knee and he said, "You're not aiming straight." 3) The difference between Congress and a federal prison is that one is filled with tax evaders, blackmailers and threats to society. The other is for housing prisoners.

4) My second wife wasn't a very good cook. She did get a little better later on in life when she figured out that the smoke alarm wasn't a timer. 5) I was once pulled over for drinking while driving. I accused them of "profiling" but I lost the case. As it turned out, they were stopping every car driving down that particular sidewalk.....and that's five !

Today's HoroscopeCapricorn - January 7th: Cheating is going to occur within the next day, although it is unsure who is at fault. It could actually just be in a poker game. You may be caught out this week. This is not the first time. You must really be careful in the future. Seek comfort in clothing.

Birthdays: My sweet friend Luly 19XX, Millard Fillmore, 13th President of the United States 1800, Francis Poulenc composer and pianist 1899, Zora Neale Hurston author 1901, Charles Addams cartoonist 1912, David Caruso actor 1956, Katie Couric journalist 1957, Nicolas Cage actor 1964.

The AREA 51 Retirement Home Bar And Grill: One day, there was a catastrophic event that caused all living creatures on Earth to die. To sort things out, everyone went to heaven. God came and said, "I want the men to form two lines. One line for the men who ruled their women on Earth and the other line for the men who were ruled by their women. Also, I want all the women to go with St. Peter."

With that said and done, the next time God looked, the women were gone and there were two lines. The line of men who were ruled by their women was 1,000 miles long and in the line of men who ruled their women, there was only one man.

God became angry and said, "You men should be ashamed of yourselves. I created you in my image and you were all whipped by your mates. Look at the only one of my sons who stood up and made me proud. Learn from him!

Tell them, my son, how did you manage to be the only one in this line?" The man replied, "I don't know, my wife told me to stand here."

A customer asked the clerk, "In what aisle can I find the Polish sausage?" The clerk asks, "Are you Polish?" The guy, clearly offended, says, "Yes I am. But let me ask you something. If I had asked for Italian sausage, would you ask me if I was Italian? Or if I had asked for German Bratwurst, would you ask me if I was German?"

He continued, "If I asked for a kosher hot dog would you ask me if I was Jewish? Or if I had asked for a Taco, would you ask if I was Mexican? Or if I asked for some Irish whiskey, would you ask if I was Irish?"

The clerk says, "No, I probably wouldn't." The guy says, "Well then, because I asked for Polish sausage, why did you ask me if I'm Polish?" The clerk replied, "Because you're in Home Depot."

The Hits Just Keep On Coming: A female reporter asked a man at a bar, "Do you drink beer every day?" The man replied, "Yes." The lady inquired, "How much beer a day? The man said, "Around 3 six-packs starting at noon."

The lady asked, "How much does a 6-pack cost?" The man said, "Roughly $10.00 at the deli." The lady Interviewer continued, "And how long have you been drinking like that?" The man answered, "Around 15 years."

The lady said, "So with a six-pack costing $10.00 and you consuming 3 six-packs a day, you are spending roughly $900 each month. In one year, you would then be spending $10,800, correct?" The man said, "Correct."

The lady Interviewer inquired, "If in 1 year you spend $10,800 on beer, not accounting for inflation, 15 years puts your spending roughly $162,000. Did it ever occur to you that if you did not drink for the last 15 years, you could have bought a Ferrari?

The man asked the lady, "Do you drink?" The lady Interviewer replied, "No." The man said, "So where's your f**kin' Ferrari?"

Sleeping Beauty, Tom Thumb and Quasimodo were all talking one day. Sleeping Beauty said, "I believe myself to be the most beautiful girl in the world." Tom Thumb said, "I must be the smallest person in the world." Quasimodo said, "I absolutely have to be the most disgusting person in the world."

So they all decided to go to the Guinness Book of World Records to have their claims verified. Sleeping Beauty went in first and came out looking deliriously happy, "It's official, I am the most beautiful girl in the world." Tom Thumb went next and emerged triumphant, "I am now officially the smallest person in the world."

Sometime later, Quasimodo comes out looking utterly confused and says, "Who the hell is Rosie O'Donnell ?"

That's it for today, my little rose buds. Remember, the voices in your head are not real, but they do have some good ideas. AREA 51 is off the agenda tonight as I am still fighting this bug. I feel much better, but the coughing persists.

More on Friday.

Stay Tuned !

1 comment:

jack69 said...

Hey, glad youare feeling better, you will have a ball next new years eve!!!
Shoulda been three dead intead of 1, hopefully it won't take the French 2 yrs to bring them to trial.
Our system is thinking about bringing the Boston Marathon bomber to trial, maybe.
I have been staring at my eyes, Imma thinking they are slanting a little.
Oh by the way, you saved me a trip to the dr. about the water on my knee!
Great post dude, thanks for the entertainment.