Friday, March 14, 2014

I Don't Like Spiders And Snakes

(Reuters) - Barack Obama, aiming to allay concerns about the viability of his signature healthcare law, said on Friday enough people have enrolled to make its insurance marketplaces stable. "Well, at this point, enough people are signing up that the Affordable Care Act is going to work," Obama said in an interview with the medical website WebMD. "The insurance companies will continue to offer these plans."

The Obama administration is mounting an enrollment drive aimed at adults aged 18 to 34, whose participation in the marketplaces is vital to the success of the Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act.

In his latest bid to persuade people to enroll before a March 31 deadline for 2014 coverage, Obama found himself on the defensive, noting for example that some enrollees might have to change doctors. "For the average person, many folks who don't have health insurance initially, they're going to have to make some choices. And they might end up having to switch doctors, in part because they're saving money," said Obama.

That was a change from his assurance to Americans in 2009, when he was trying to get the law passed, that "if you like the doctor you have, you can keep your doctor."

Liars and thieves are two types of people I cannot stand. Barack Obama is a liar and the shiftless, underhanded, graft taking government fits the description of said liars and thieves.

White lies are sometimes a necessary evil but do not make the mistake of pissing on the American public and telling them it's raining.....

"We have to pass the bill to find out what is in it" 
The News As I See It: The crisis in Ukraine still has people worried. John McCain led a group of senators there to get a firsthand look. When they landed, McCain said, "This is a disaster, these people are living like animals!" Then someone said, "We have a layover — this is LaGuardia Airport."

Things are moving quickly over there. Crimea is now holding a vote on whether to join Russia, but the ballot doesn’t have an option for voting against the plan — it lets people vote for joining Russia now or down the road. When asked where he got the idea, Vladimir Putin said, "The Apple user agreement."

Washington recently had a big power outage. That's not really news. The Obama administration has been without power the entire second term. When the lights went out, Senator John McCain tried to clap them back on.

Best Buy will start selling solar panels in an effort to promote energy conservation. Best Buy says you can find the panels right next to the 300 flat-screen TVs they leave on all day.

Obama went shopping at The Gap here in New York City. He ended up buying a sweater for each of his daughters and a workout jacket for the first lady. You know, whenever someone visits New York City, the one souvenir people really want is something from The Gap. The family was happy with the gifts, though. Barry usually comes home with a bucket of Church's Fried Chicken and a pack of Marlboros.

It’s been very tense between Russia and the U.S. In fact, lawmakers in Russia have started a petition to get the U.S. kicked out of this year's World Cup. On the other hand, they could just take the easier route and wait until we lose in the first round to literally any other country.

A family called the police because their cat cornered them in a bedroom. They would've climbed out the window but their hamster was blocking the way.

The Rolling Stones' Keith Richards just announced that he is working on a new children’s book. It’s called "Oh, the Places You’ll Wake Up."

New reports show that the Crimean vote to join Russia on Sunday did not include an option for "no." There were only two boxes on the ballot, one for "yes" and one for "murder my family."

This Date In History: 1743; The first town meeting was held in Boston, Massachusetts, at Faneuil Hall. 1794; The cotton gin was patented by Eli Whitney. 1939; The Republic of Czechoslovakia was dissolved, soon to be occupied by the Nazis.

1950; The FBI’s “Ten Most Wanted Fugitives” list made its debut. 1958; Perry Como's single "Catch a Falling Star" became the first RIAA gold record.

1964; Jack Ruby was found guilty of the murder of Lee Harvey Oswald, alleged assassin of President John F. Kennedy. 1990; The Soviet Congress voted Mikhail Gorbachev into the newly-created and powerful position of president.

Picture Of The Day: Now that's a big puppy.....!

Printable Things I Never Told You: 1) Ladies, men will never get what you mean by "I’m fine" unless there’s a crack of lightening and scary music. Even that might be too subtle. 2) Some kid threw a rainbow slushee at my windshield. At first I thought I hit a unicorn until I realized I wasn't in San Francisco. 3) Keep your friend's toast, but keep your enemy's toaster. 4) I'm not sure if I washed the spider down the drain in my shower or if he took one look at me naked and then leaped willingly to his death. 5) I have said it before and I will say it again. If anyone is into wife swapping, I will take a dirt bike or a puppy.....and that's five !

Today's HoroscopePisces - March 14th: Today might be the day when you get stuck in a hole with a dwarf. Remember all the research you did into dwarf habits in order to prevent mental breakdown. Giving nicknames like "Shorty" or any reference to Snow White's entourage may be in poor taste.

Birthdays: Georg Telemann, composer 1681, Giovanni Schiaparelli, astronomer 1835, Paul Ehrlich, bacteriologist 1854, Casey Jones, railroad engineer 1864, Albert Einstein, American theoretical physicist 1879, Diane Arbus, photographer 1923, Quincy Jones, composer 1933, Michael Caine, actor 1933, Billy Crystal, actor, comedian, writer 1947.

The AREA 51 Retirement Home Bar And Grill: One evening a husband, thinking it would be being funny, said to his wife, "Maybe we should start washing your clothes in Slim Fast. Maybe It would probably take a few inches off of your ass."

His wife was not amused, and decided that she simply couldn’t let such a comment go unrewarded. The next morning the husband took a pair of underwear out of his drawer. A small dust cloud appeared when he shook them out. ‘He hollered into the bathroom, "Mabel, Why did you put talcum powder in my underwear?" She replied, "It’s not talcum powder, it’s Miracle Grow!"

A man is at work one day when he notices that his co-worker is wearing an earring. This man knows his co-worker to be a normally conservative fellow and is curious about his sudden change in 'fashion sense.'

The man walks up to him and says, "I didn't know you were into earrings." The man replies sheepishly, "Don't make such a big deal, it's only an earring."

His friend falls silent for a few minutes, but then his curiosity prods him to say, "So, how long have you been wearing one?" The man replies, "Ever since my wife found it in my car."

The Hits Just Keep On Coming: A man goes to the doctor with a long history of migraine headaches. When the doctor does his history and physical, he discovers that his poor patient has had practically every therapy known to man for his migraines and no improvement.

The Doc says, "Listen, I have migraines, too and the advice I'm going to give you isn't really anything I learned in medical school, but it's advice that I've gotten from my own experience. When I have a migraine, I go home, get in a nice hot bathtub, and soak for a while. Then I have my wife sponge me off with the hottest water I can stand, especially around the forehead. This helps a little."

He continued, "Then I get out of the tub, take her into the bedroom and even if my head is killing me, I force myself to have sex with her. Almost always, the headache is immediately gone. Now, give it a try, and come back and see me in six weeks."

Six weeks later, the patient returns with a big grin. "Doc! I took your advice and it works! It really works! I've had migraines for 17 years and this is the first time anyone has ever helped me!"

The physician said, "I'm glad I could help." The patient adds, "By the way, Doc, you have a really nice house."

A Louisiana couple had 9 children. They went to the doctor to see about getting the husband "fixed". The doctor gladly started the required procedure and asked them why, after nine children, would they choose to do this.

The husband replied that they had read in a recent article that one out of every ten children being born in North America was Mexican and they didn’t want to take a chance on having a Mexican baby because neither of them could speak Spanish.

That's it for today, my little daylight savers. Remember, if those people who were ever mean to you were laid out end to end, you could drive your car right over them. I'm going to slide by AREA 51 for happy hour.

Have a great weekend and more on Monday.

Stay Tuned !


Paula said...

That's one big puppy in the picture.Hope you're having fun at Area 51.

jack69 said...

I do agree with your assessment of our President. On my last vote, I tried that if you don't like your president you don't have to keep him, But that was a lie too.

Good line on McCain.(Two of 'em)

On the "FBI in peace and war" on Sat night radio they always read out one of the descriptions of that most wanted list. I must have seen 50 guys that looked like that the next day and they were all in church.
Enjoy the evening at Area 51 and the weekend.