Wednesday, February 17, 2016

Who Let The Dogs Out?

Hillary barking like a dog, Trump insulting everybody and Harry Reid ranting over Republican intentions of not filling Scalia's vacancy until the elections while a 2007 democratic speech video took the same stance provide me with pages of fodder for my journal.

Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell took to Twitter to announce his intentions of not filling Justice Scalia's vacancy until after Americans have chosen a new president.

Meanwhile, in response to McConnell, Nevada Senator Harry Reid said it would be, "unprecedented in recent history for SCOTUS to go year with vacancy" and called a failure to replace Scalia a "shameful abdication of our constitutional responsibility."

That is, until Chuck Schumer's 2007 speech (YouTube) was rediscovered where he advocated that Democrats not fill a Supreme Court vacancy until after George W. Bush left office. Uh, Harry, I think that is a precedent.

On another presidential candidate stage, Hillary Clinton was in the middle of a riff about how, in her view, Republicans say things that are not true, when she remembered a radio ad that she said ran in rural Arkansas while her husband, Bill Clinton, was running for office.

She said,"They (Republicans) actually, with a straight face, say that the great recession was caused by too much regulation on Wall Street."

Hillary continued, "One of my favorite political ads of all time was a radio ad in rural Arkansas where the announcer said, 'Wouldn't it be great if somebody running for office said something, we could have an immediate reaction to whether it was true or not. Well, we have trained this dog. Well, the dog, if it is not true, he is going to bark and the dog was barking on the radio and so people were barking at each other for days after that."

She went on, "I want to figure out how we can do that with Republicans. We need to get that dog and follow them around and every time they say these things like, 'Oh, the Great Recession was caused by too much regulation,' arrf, arrfh, arrh, arrh," letting out a barking noise that caused the audience to laugh and some people to mimic her. 

Clinton concluded, "I think we could cut right through a lot of their claims."

Methinks if that "dog" were to have existed, loud barking would have been heard throughout the land from Bill Clinton's White House (Monica Lewinsky) and would continue to bark incessantly every time Hillary opens her mouth. But, that's just me.....

The News As I See It: The 31st annual LA Marathon was last weekend. Between the marathon and Obama's visit it was a big week for Kenyans screwing up LA traffic.

The Ted Cruz campaign has pulled a new ad after it was revealed that the actress in it has appeared in soft-core porn; and now Jeb has hired her to teach him how to act like he's enjoying something.

Hillary Clinton and Bernie Sanders were both in Las Vegas over the weekend. Hillary attended a campaign rally, while Bernie played the nickel slots.

Prostitutes at a Nevada brothel have launched a campaign for Hillary Clinton called "Hookers for Hillary." Apparently they want to donate money to the Clintons, or as they call it, "Giving back.

This Date In History: 1674; The Netherlands and England signed the Peace of Westminster, by which New Amsterdam passed to the English (and was renamed New York). 1807; Aaron Burr, vice president under Thomas Jefferson, was arrested for treason. He was later acquitted.

1878; Thomas Edison patented the gramophone (phonograph). 1942; President Franklin Roosevelt signed an executive order that resulted in the internment of thousands of Japanese-Americans living on the West Coast.

1945; The U.S. Marines went ashore at Iwo Jima. 1959; Britain, Turkey, and Greece signed the agreement granting Cyprus independence. 1968; The first nationwide broadcast of Mr. Roger's Neighborhood aired on PBS.

1997; Deng Xiaoping, Chinese Communist leader, died. 2008; Fidel Castro resigned as President of Cuba after 49 years in power. Raúl Castro, Fidel's brother, succeeded him as president.

Picture Of The Day: He rants, he raves, he insults and yet, he remains at the top of the polls. Maybe America is just looking for a president with balls.....

Printable Things I Never Told You: 1) Being dyslexic has drawbacks. I once went to a toga party dressed as a goat. 2) People who complain about the way the ball bounces are usually the ones that dropped it. 3) I had amnesia once - maybe twice. 4) My credit is so bad that Mastercard is now sending me my bills in Spanish. 5) It's hard to write a good drinking song. I can never make it past the first few bars.....and that's five !

Today's Horoscope: Aquarius - February 17th: The evidence for love is staring you in the face, but you can't see the forest for the trees. If you find this is true for you, I think the best thing to do is to stop wandering into forests. Wandering is dangerous. Had this been an actual emergency, I would have fled in terror and you would not have been notified.

Birthdays: Nicholas Copernicus, Polish astronomer 1473, David Garrick, actor and dramatist 1717, Eddie Arcaro, jockey 1916, Carson McCullers, novelist 1917, Lee Marvin, actor 1924, Smokey Robinson, singer 1940, Amy Tan, novelist 1952.

The AREA 51 Retirement Home Bar And Grill: The owner of small business was confused about how much he should pay for an invoice, which included a volume discount. So he decided to ask his blonde secretary.

He called her into his office and said, "You graduated from college, and I need some help. If I were to give you $7,525 minus 12.5% for a discount, how much would you take off?" She paused briefly and then replied, "Everything but my earrings."

A sailor said to his captain as he saluted, "Skipper, a special message just came in for you from the admiral. I have it right here." The captain ordered, "Read it to me!"

The sailor began reading nervously, "You are without a doubt the most idiotic, lame-brained officer ever to command a ship in the United States Navy." The skipper responded, "Have that communication decoded at once!"

The Hits Just Keep On Coming: A man goes to visit a fortune teller. In a dark and hazy room, peering into a crystal ball, the mystic said, "You complain about your wife's constant nagging and yelling, yet you still remain married. There's no easy way to say this, so I'll just be blunt. Prepare yourself to be a widow. Your wife will die a violent and horrible death this year."

Visibly shaken, the man stares at the fortune teller's lined face, then at the single flickering candle, then down at her hands. He took a few deep breaths to compose himself. He simply had to know. He met the fortune-teller's gaze, steadied his voice, and asked, "Will I be found guilty?"

A male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose. A young student nurse appears and gives him a partial sponge bath. He mumbles from behind the mask, "Nurse, are my testicles black?"

Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, "I don't know, Sir. I'm only here to wash your upper body and feet." He struggles to ask again, "Nurse, please check for me. Are my testicles black?"

Concerned that he might elevate his blood pressure and heart rate from worrying about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and pulls back the covers. She raises his gown, holds his manhood in one hand and his testicles gently in the other.

She looks very closely and says, "There's nothing wrong with them, Sir. They look fine." The man slowly pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her, and says very slowly, "Thank you very much. That was wonderful. Now listen very, very closely, "Are - my - test - results - back?"

That's it for today, my little cupcakes. Remember, a relationship is the period of time between "I love you" and "Everything you do pisses me off." I'm heading over to AREA 51 for happy hour.

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More on Friday.

Stay Tuned !

1 comment:

jack69 said...

Very interesting information about the Justice replacements. Thanks.
Also a good read and thanks for the smiles.
Good line about getting past the first few bars!
Nite from North Carolina.