Wednesday, May 23, 2012
The Disco Daze
The recent deaths of the Bee Gees' Robin Gibb and disco queen Donna Summer took me back to the nostalgic 1970's when disco was a major part of the music scene. Thoughts of bell botton pants, colorful shirts and endless nights of dancing and partying brought back many good memories and satiated my senses.
Time has a way of making way for the new and easing out the old, Such is life, but memories are something that can never be taken from you. Each and every song or star always seem to evoke memories from all of us and those of us who were lucky enough to have seen and heard Robin Gibb and Donna Summer have them etched in our minds forever.
The News As I See It:
Congratulations to former Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi. The city of San Francisco has named a street after her this week. It's called Botox Avenue.
Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg got married a couple of days ago. At their wedding, Zuckerberg's wife wore a dress that cost nearly $5,000. That is until the dress went public. Now it's worth $2,000. Facebook has lost so much money that Zuckerberg has been named an honorary board member of JPMorgan.
More bad news for CNN. They just had their lowest rating in 15 years. Their ratings are so low that today both Al "Have Podium, Will Travel" Sharpton and Jesse Jackson turned them down for an interview.
DC Comics announced that one of its existing superheroes will be reintroduced as gay. I've got my money on Aquaman and Dog Groomer Man. I wonder if they'll be changing the name of the comic to AC/DC.
Keeping Up With the Kardashians began their seventh season this week. It's such a busy time for the Kardashians right now with the new season starting and the ongoing Basketball playoffs, which as you know, is the time when the Kardashians go into heat and mate with anyone who is over six feet tall and dribbles. Meanwhile, Khloe Kardashian is refusing to take a paternity test to determine if she's actually a Kardashian. She said, "I think my record of fame without talent speaks for itself."
Obama gave the commencement speech at Barnard College the other day. He told graduates their future is bright unless they want jobs.
A 1920 Babe Ruth uniform sold at a sports memorabilia auction for $4 million. As a matter of fact, it was the uniform he was wearing when he was first dating Betty White.
Al Gore has a new girlfriend (that is unless the Supreme Court takes her away from him. Apparently, it's getting pretty serious. He's already been over to bore her parents. Gore and his girlfriend were spotted taking long walks on the beach, measuring how much the sea is rising.
This Date In History: 1430; Joan of Arc was captured by the Burgundians and subsequently sold to the English. 1788; South Carolina became the 8th state in United States. 1830; The Baltimore and Ohio Railroad began the first passenger service in the United States.
1873; The North West Mounted Police force was formed in Canada. It would later be known as the Royal Canadian Mounted Police. 1911; The New York Public Library, at the time the largest marble structure ever built in the United States, was dedicated by President Taft in New York City after 16 years of construction.
1934; Bonnie (Parker) and Clyde (Barrow) were killed in a police shootout. 1945; Heinrich Himmler, head of Adolf Hitler’s Gestapo, committed suicide while in prison. 1949; The German Federal Republic came into existence. 1997; Moderate Mohammad Khatami was elected president of Iran.
Picture Of The Day: The world lost an excellent singer, musician and songwriter. Rest In Pease, Robin.
Printable Things I Never Told You: 1) Sometimes I get really lonely, especially when I'm throwing a Frisbee. 2) I don't have a microwave oven, but I do have a clock that occasionally cooks stuff. 3) I wouldn't want to have my face on the cover of a Wheaties box, but I would like to have my face on the cover of a Rice Krispies box. "Snap, Krackle, Jimmy and Pop"! 4) New studies have found that people who snore have a higher risk of cancer. In most cases, however, the spouse will smother them with the pillow long before the cancer takes them. 5) Admitting to shooting the sheriff is not a good alibi when being accused of shooting the deputy.....and that's five !
Today's Horoscope: Gemini - May 23rd: Alas, the morning will be useless but buck up my friends, the evening will go very well. Most of your dreams will come true over the coming weekend, so prepare for wealth, love and the chance of romance is 87.63 percent. You may think later this week that your computer has been hacked by your sexy 19 year old neighbor, Marie, but you will soon come to realize that actually, a ferret has chewed through the cord of your mouse.
Birthdays: Carolus Linnaeus botanist 1707, Charles Barry architect 1795, Margaret Fuller, American writer and lecturer 1810, Alfred Pritchard Sloan, Jr., businessman and philanthropist 1875, Douglas Fairbanks, actor 1883, John Bardeen physicist 1908, Anatoly Karpov, chess master 1951.
The AREA 51 Retirement Home Bar And Grill: A hooded robber burst into a Texas bank and forced the tellers to load a sack full of cash. On his way out the door, a brave Texas customer grabbed the hood and pulled it off revealing the robber’s face. The robber shot the customer in the leg without a moment’s hesitation.
He then looked around the bank to see if anyone else was looking. Everyone else, by now very scared, looked intently down at the floor in silence. The robber yelled, "Well, did anyone else see my face?" There are a few moments of utter silence in which everyone was plainly afraid to speak.
Then, an old cowboy tentatively raised his hand, and while keeping his head down said, "I think my wife got a pretty good look at you."
Old Aunt Clara went to a new doctor to see what could be done about her troublesome constipation. She said to the doctor, "It's terrible! I haven't moved my bowels in more than a week." The doctor said, "I see. Have you done anything about it?"
Aunt Clara replied, "Oh, yes. I sit in the bathroom for a good half of an hour in the morning and then again at night." The doctor said, "No, I mean do you take anything?" Aunt Clara answered, "Just a magazine...
The Hits Just Keep On Coming: A blonde in her fourth year as a UCLA Freshman, sat in her US Government class. The professor asked the blonde if she knew what Roe vs. Wade was about. She pondered the question then, finally said, "Yes, that was the decision George Washington had to make before he crossed the Delaware."
Three old men are talking about their aches, pains and bodily dysfunctions. One seventy-five year old man says, "I have this problem. I wake up every morning at seven and it takes me twenty minutes to pee."
An eighty year old man says, "My case is worse. I get up at eight and I sit there and grunt and groan for half an hour before I finally have a bowel movement."
The ninety year old man says, "At seven I pee like a race horse and at eight I shit like a cow." The other men ask, "So what's your problem?" The man replied, "I don't wake up until nine."
The nun teaching Sunday school was speaking to her class one morning and she asked the question, "When you die and go to Heaven, which part of your body goes first?" Suzy raised her hand and said, "I think it's your hands."
The nun said, "Why do you think it's your hands, Suzy?" Suzy replied, "Because when you pray, you hold your hands together in front of you and God just takes your hands first." The nun said, "What a wonderful answer!"
Little Johnny raised his hand and said, "Sister, I think it's your feet." The nun looked at him with a bewildered look on her face and said, "Johnny, why do you think it would be your feet?"
Johnny said, "Well, I walked into Mom and Dad's bedroom the other night. Mom had her legs straight up in the air and she was saying, "Oh God! I'm coming!'" If Dad hadn't pinned her down, we'd have lost her."
That's it for today, my little jitterbugs. Remember, love hides in strange places and could be waiting for you where you least expect it. Or it could be hidden in a closet, bound and gagged. Keep in mind that the rule is "i" before "e" except in Budweiser. I'm off to AREA 51 for happy hour. More on Friday.
Stay Tuned !