Wednesday, April 22, 2015
Rest In Peace Steve Byrnes
Steve Byrnes, the longtime FOX Sports NASCAR broadcaster whose courageous battle against cancer drew support from every corner of stock car racing, died Tuesday at age 56. Byrnes passed away just two days after the race at Bristol Motor Speedway, which was named the "Food City 500 in Support of Steve Byrnes."
Though he was unable to attend the race, Byrnes watched it on TV and tweeted a response to a fan who asked if he made it through the entire rain-delayed event. Byrnes tweeted, "I went the distance."
Steve was almost always seen with a smile on his face, and kept up a relentlessly positive attitude throughout his cancer fight. He often shared insights into his battle via social media and a legion of #ByrnesStrong supporters tweeted their encouragement to him. He usually responded, always grateful and appreciative of the well wishes.
Even when he learned his cancer had spread after a second full round of treatment, Byrnes showed no signs of giving up. During Sunday's race, crewmen from every team stood on the pit wall with signs from the Stand Up To Cancer organization that read "I stand up for Steve."
Byrnes tweeted Sunday, "Thanks to all for a remarkable day, my teammates at NASCAR ON FOX. Miss you all. Thanks for your love." The heartbreaking news came just two days later. Rest in peace, Steve......
The News As I See It: Tim Tebow will officially sign a contract with the Eagles. It is pretty shocking, mainly because I didn't even know he played an instrument.
In North Korea, Kim Jong Un is said to have achieved something that is literally incredible. According to their state-run media, over the weekend Kim Jong Un climbed the highest mountain in the country, which is 9,000 feet high and takes days to climb. This was reportedly no problem for a man built like Roseanne Barr.
Obama hosted NASCAR racing champion Kevin Harvick at the White House. They both spent an hour or two not having the slightest interest in what the other is saying.
An intruder was arrested at the White House last night after trying to jump the fence. Authorities aren’t releasing the fence jumper’s identity, but they did say that she tore her pantsuit.
The way I see it, ladies, if he leaves the stickers on his dorky flat brimmed baseball hat that he's wearing backwards and his arms are marked with what seems to be graffiti, that's his way of telling you he won't pay child support.
This Date In History: 1500; Pedro Alvares Cabral discovered Brazil and claimed it for Portugal. 1509; Henry VIII became king of England. 1616; The Spanish poet Cervantes died in Madrid. (Some sources say April 23.)
1864; Congress authorized the inscription "In God We Trust" on coins minted as U.S. currency. 1889; The land rush in Oklahoma began when it was opened to settlers. 1970; The first Earth Day was observed.
1994; Richard M. Nixon died of a stroke at the age of 81. 2000; Armed immigration agents took Elian Gonzalez from the Miami home of his relatives to reunite him with his father.
Picture Of The Day: If there's any consolation about Steve's passing, it's the fact that he was able to see Sunday's celebration of his life at Bristol Motor Speedway and the many NASCAR fans, drivers, owners and others who showed him their love and appreciation.
Printable Things I Never Told You: 1) Damn! I didn't make it to the gym today! That makes 5 years in a row. 2) I see dead people. Technically they're stupid people, but give it time. 3) A good indication of the intelligence of celebrities can be measured by the names they give their children. In an interview, one particular pair mentioned their children, "Shoe and Turbo Pickle." 4) It was an awkward moment when she said, "And yet your feet are so big." 5) The worst time to need to sneeze is when you’re driving. The worst time to need to pee is when you’re driving and need to sneeze....and that's five !
Today's Horoscope: Taurus - April 22nd: Dank, inhospitable service station toilets may turn out to be your best friend today. After all, like life, it's just one big crap chute, anyway.
Birthdays: Isabella I, Spanish queen of Castile and León (1474–1504), daughter of John II of Castile 1451, Henry Fielding, author 1707, Immanuel Kant, philosopher 1724, Vladimir Lenin, Russian revolutionary 1870, Vladimir Nabokov, author 1899, J. Robert Oppenheimer, nuclear physicist 1904, Charles Mingus, jazz musician 1922, Bettie Page, model, pinup 1923, Jack Nicholson, actor 1937.
The AREA 51 Retirement Home Bar And Grill: A bride who got a little too drunk at her wedding reception was still determined to say a few words of thanks to the guests for all their presents.
She stumbled through a short speech and then slowly turned to point to the presents on display, which included a coffee percolator.
She said, "And finally, I want to thank my new parents-in-law for giving us such a beautiful perky copulator."
A group of Americans were traveling by tour bus through Switzerland . As they stopped at a cheese farm, a young guide led them through the process of cheese making, explaining that goat's milk was used.
She showed the group a lovely hillside where many goats were grazing. She explained, "These are the older goats put out to pasture when they no longer produce." She then asked, "What do you do in America with your old goats?" A spry old gentleman answered, "They send us on bus tours....."
The Hits Just Keep On Coming: Obama was out jogging one morning along the parkway when he tripped, fell over the bridge railing and landed in the creek below. Before the Secret Service guys could get to him, three kids who were fishing pulled him out of the water. He was so grateful he offered the kids whatever they wanted.
The first kid said, "I want to go to Disney World." Obama said, "No problem, I'll take you there on Air Force One." The second kid said, "I want a new pair of Nike Air Jordan shoes." Barrack said, "I'll get them for you and even have Michael Jordan sign them."
The third kid said, "I want a motorized wheelchair with a built in TV and stereo headset." Obama was a little perplexed by this and said, "But you don't look like you're handicapped." The kid said, "I will be after my dad finds out I saved your ass from drowning."
The day after his wife disappeared In a kayaking accident, an Anchorage man answered his door to find two grim-faced Alaska State Troopers. They said, "We're sorry Mr. Wilkens, but we have some information about your wife." Wilkens exclaimed, "Tell me! Did you find her?"
The troopers looked at each other. One said, "We have some bad news, some good news and some really great news. Which would you like to hear first?" Fearing the worst, Mr. Wilkens said, "Give me the bad news first." The trooper said, "I'm sorry to tell you, sir, but this morning we found your wife's body in Kachemak Bay." Wilkens said, "Oh my God!"
Swallowing hard, he asked, "What's the good news?" The trooper continued, "When we pulled her up, she had 12 twenty-five-pound king crabs and 6 good-sized Dungeness crabs clinging to her, and we feel you are entitled to a share in the catch."
Stunned, Mr. Wilkens demanded, "If that's the good news, then what's the great news?" The trooper replied, "We're gonna pull her up again tomorrow."
That's it for today, my little whipporwills. Remember, if you call the 1-800 number printed on a consumer product, 9 out of 10 times the person who answers won't tell you what they're wearing. I'm heading over to AREA 51 for happy hour.
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More on Friday.
Stay Tuned !