Wednesday, May 26, 2010

BP Oil's Gulf Of Mexico Disaster Is Many Times Worse Than The Exxon Valdez Alaskan Oil Spill !

BP Oil is attempting to plug the oil leak in the gulf of Mexico today and, quite frankly, if they fail to do so, the Gulf and the inhabitants who depend on it are going to be in a world of hurt. The nation is fed up with BP Oil and their inability to resolve the problem. Moreover, the nation is fed up with the Obozo Administration's failure to attend to this problem and come to the aid of Gulf residents who are already feeling the effects of this catastrophe.

Obama's failure to take control of the BP catastrophe has all the news media making comments about the government's failure to respond and take charge. James Carville, the famously outspoken Louisiana Democrat who was a chief political aide to Bill and Hillary Clinton, told CNN's Anderson Cooper that the administration's response to the spill has been "lackadaisical" and that Obama was "naive" to trust BP to manage the massive clean-up effort.

On another note, President Obozo reportedly is sending 1,200 National Guard troops the Mexican border to help secure the Southwest Border against Mexican drug cartels. It's funny how he thinks that 1,200 troops will stop the massive drug cartel's vast ways to smuggle drugs, but then again, he also seems to think the Arizona's border policy is funny as well.

On A Sad Note: The legendary television show host Art Linkletter died today in his Bel Air, California home at the age of 97.

The News As I See It: Today is National Tap Dancing Day. It’s the day we honor BP executives trying to explain the Gulf oil disaster. More fallout from the BP oil spill today. It turns out that Spongebob found tar balls in his squarepants.

Mexican President Felipe Calderon lashed out at Arizona over their immigration law. He said that Mexicans should boycott sneaking into this country until that law is repealed.

At the Shanghai World Expo, Secretary of State Hillary Clinton passed out teddy bears to Chinese children. The children politely accepted the bears — even though they made them.

And finally, a new study has found that use of Viagra can double your chances of hearing loss. What?

This Date In History: 1521; Martin Luther's writings were banned by the Edict of Worms. 1868; President Andrew Johnson avoided conviction for impeachment charges of "high crimes and misdemeanors" by one vote. 1940; Allied troops began the massive naval evacuation of troops from Dunkirk, France, during World War II. 1959; Pittsburgh Pirates’ Harvey Haddix pitched 12 perfect innings against the Milwaukee Braves before losing, 1–0, in the 13th.

1977; George Willig, "the human fly," scaled the World Trade Center in New York City by attaching himself to the window washer mechanism and walking straight up until falling into police custody when he reached the top. It took Willig three and a half hours to make the climb, and $1.10 in fines—a penny per floor. 1978; The first legal casino to be operated in the United States outside of Nevada was opened in Atlantic City.

Picture Of The Day: It's been a hectic day so far and my pictures are an eclectic display of how this day's news has affected me. The picture of the day is the giant cactus at the Arizona border. I am in agreement with the Arizona law and the picture depicts my feelings about the matter to a tee! I also discovered a couple of nice photoshop pictures of two women. I liked them quite a bit, so I thought I'd show them to you.

Printable Things I Never Told You: 1) I never knew what happiness was until I got married and then it was too late! 2) You may have a heart of gold, but so does a hard-boiled egg. 3) I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous - everyone hasn't met me yet. 4) There's too much blood in my alcohol system. 5) Rap is to music as Etch-A-Sketch is to art.....and that's five !

Birthdays: Washington Augustus Roebling, engineer 1837, Isadora Duncan, dancer 1878, Al Jolson, actor, singer 1886, Dorothea Lange, photographer 1895, John Wayne, actor 1907, Miles Davis, musician 1926, Stevie Nicks, singer 1948, Sally K. Ride, American astronaut 1951.

The AREA 51 Retirement Home Bar and Grill: Two old guys, Abe and Sol, sitting on a bench in a park feeding pigeons and talking about baseball, just like they did every day. Abe turns to Sol and says, "Do you think there's baseball in heaven?" Soloman thinks about it for a minute and replies, "I dunno, Abe. But let's make a deal. If I die first, I will come back and tell you, and if you die first, you come back and tell me, if there is baseball in heaven." They shake on it and, sadly, a few months later poor Abe passes on.

One day soon afterward, Sol is sitting there feeding the pigeons by himself when he hears a voice whisper, "Sol... Sol...." Sol responds, "Abe! Is that you?" The spirit of Abe whispers, "Yes it is." Sol, still amazed, asks, "So, is there baseball in heaven?" Abe says, "Well, I got good news and I got bad news." Sol says, "Gimme the good news first." Abe says, "Well... there is baseball in heaven." Sol says, "That's great! What news could be bad enough to ruin that?" Abe sighs and whispers, "You're pitching on Friday."

The Hits Just Keep On Coming: My thanks to my pals Garnett and Victor for their contributions to today's stories.

Four married guys go golfing. During the 4th hole the first guy said, "You have no idea what I had to do to be able to come out golfing this weekend. I had to promise my wife that I will paint every room in the house next weekend." The second guy said, "That's nothing, I had to promise my wife that I will build her a new deck for the pool." The third guy said, "Man, you both have it easy! I had to promise my wife that I will remodel the kitchen for her."

They continue to play the hole when they realized that the fourth guy has not said a word. So they ask him, "You haven't said anything about what you had to do to be able to come golfing this weekend. What's the deal?" The fourth guy says, "I just set my alarm for 5:30a.m. When it went off, I shut off my alarm, gave the wife a nudge and said, "Golf Course or Intercourse?' She said, "Wear your sweater."

A guy out on the golf course takes a high speed ball right in the crotch. Writhing in agony, he falls to the ground. As soon as he could manage, he took himself to the doctor. He said "How bad is it doc? I'm going on my honeymoon next week and my fiance is still a virgin - in every way." The doctor told him, "I'll have to put your willie in a splint to let it heal and keep it straight. It should be okay next week." He took four tongue depressors and formed a neat little 4 sided splint, and taped it all together.

The guy mentions none of this to his girl, marries her, and goes on their honeymoon. That night in the motel room, she rips open her blouse to reveal her beautiful breasts. She said, "You're the first! No one has ever touched these." He immediately drops his pants and replies, "Look at this, still in the crate!"

A man and his friend were enjoying deer hunting season in rural Arkansas near a blacktop highway. A huge buck walked by and the hunter carefully drew his bow and took careful aim. Before he could release his arrow, his friend pointed at a funeral procession passing on the road below their stand. The hunter slowly let off the pressure on his bow, took off his hat, bowed his head and closed his eyes in prayer.

His friend was amazed. "Wow, that is the most thoughtful and touching thing I have ever seen. You are the kindest man I have ever known." The hunter shrugged. "Yeah, well, we were married for 35 years."

Author's Note: Due to some recurring spam, comments will be published subject to my approval. Please continue to feel free to make any comments and they will be published as soon as I am notified.

That's it for today my little feather dusters. Remember, a politician will stand for what he thinks people will fall for. It's Hump Day and that means a field trip to AREA 51 for Happy Hour. More on Friday.

Stay Tuned !


jack69 said...

Werll I guess everyone will know now why I am deaf!

Thanks for the laughs.

Paula said...

Sorry to read about Art Linkletter. Hadn't heard that. Used to love to watch him interview the kids. Neat picture of the cactus.

garnett109 said...

tar balls jimmy?
Lmao! Thanks!

Cliff Harrison said...

It's amazing. Can we ship one of those cactus to Washington D.C. COD?

Missie said...

Enjoy your weekend!

Anonymous said...

Love the Cactus would like to have a couple of them ~
Yes and many thanks for the laughs ~ Ally x

Ally Lifewithally