Wednesday, October 28, 2015

Agitators Have No Place On Television

While discussing possible new Speaker of the House Paul Ryan, MSNBC host Melissa Harris-Perry cautioned guest Alfonso Aguilar against using the phrase "hard worker," implying that it is somehow offensive to Blacks. Really?

So what's next Ms. Harris-Perry? If I say I like fried chicken, is that racist too? Should I just say "chicken" so that your feelings don't get hurt? Rather than using your show to try to bring the races together, you're looking under rocks to find words and read a new meaning to them. 

Here's a thought. Stick your witless politically correct thoughts up your ass. My father raised me to study hard in school and to work hard in life so that I could be a better person. If trivial bullshit is going to raise your ire, you have no business being on the air.

Fortunately MSNBC is an abortion in and of itself, so I guess you fit right in along with race baiter Al Sharpton. Statements like yours only promotes division among the races.

The News As I See It: Ben Carson now holds a 14-point lead over Donald Trump in Iowa. Experts say Carson appeals to Iowa’s conservatives, Iowa’s evangelicals, and both of Iowa’s black people.

Democratic candidates Lincoln Chafee and Jim Webb announced that they are dropping out of the race. Which raises the question, what if two trees fall in the forest and there's nobody there to hear it?

According to a new report from the World Health Organization, bacon, sausage, hot dogs and others processed meats significantly increase your chance of getting cancer, which is an ugly way of saying I'm probably going to die doing what I love. I guess the point is some things in life are worth dying for and bacon is right at the top of those things.

This Date In History: 1793; Eli Whitney applied for a patent for the cotton gin. The same year, my great-great-great grandfather purchased a case of gin. Coincidence? 1886; The Statue of Liberty was dedicated in New York Harbor by President Grover Cleveland.

1919; Congress passed the Volstead Act, or the National Prohibition Act, over President Woodrow Wilson's veto. 1922; Benito Mussolini took control of the government of Italy. 1940; Italy invaded Greece during World War II.

1958; A new pope was elected—Pope John XXIII. 1962; Nikita Khrushchev told the U.S. that he had ordered the dismantling of Soviet missile bases in Cuba.

Picture Of The Day: Decisions, decisions, decisions

Printable Things I Never Told You: 1) Couples who have been married a long time start finishing each others sentences. The most popular ending being "Shut the f*ck up!" 2) I can still remember a time when I knew more than my phone. 3) I give Obama a thumbs up for wanting more extensive background checks. Let's begin with him first! 4) My friend's mother-in-law is coming to stay with him for a week. He spent today clearing out half of his closet so she would have a place to hang upside down and sleep.  5) Last week, during a routine cleanup, park crews discovered a cannon from the Revolutionary War that was still loaded. Old, loaded and ready to go — just like me before the karaoke show......and that's five !

Today's Horoscope: Scorpio - October 28th: Chew the cud with some friends today. Their inane chatter may amuse you. The randomness of the universe may affect you today as you search for meaning in a cornflake that looks a lot like your ex-mother-in-law.

Birthdays: Eliphalet Remington, gun manufacturer 1793, Edith Head, fashion designer 1897, Evelyn Waugh, novelist 1903, Jonas Salk, American physician, microbiologist, creator of the Salk vaccine for polio 1914, Dennis Franz, actor 1944, Bill Gates, computer industry pioneer 1955, Julia Roberts, actress 1967, Brad Paisley, singer, songwriter 1972, Joaquin Phoenix, actor 1974.

The AREA 51 Retirement Home Bar And Grill: A guy living in North Dakota near the Canadian Border called his buddy in Arkansas and said that since early that morning the snow had been coming down. He said it was nearly waist high and is still falling.

He told his friend, "The temperature is dropping way below zero and the north wind is increasing to near gale force. My wife has done nothing but look through the kitchen window and just stare." He said that if it gets much worse, he may have to let her in.

The Montana Department of Employment, Division of Labor Standards claimed a small rancher was not paying proper wages to his help and sent an agent out to investigate him. The agent said, "I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them."

The rancher said, "Well, there's my hired hand who's been with me for 3 years. I pay him $200 a week plus free room and board."

The rancher continued, "Then there's the mentally challenged guy. He works about 18 hours every day and does about 90 percent of all the work around here. He makes about $10 per week, pays his own room and board and I buy him a bottle of bourbon every Saturday night so he can cope with life. He also sleeps with my wife occasionally."

The agent said, "That's the guy I want to talk to - the mentally challenged one. The rancher said, "That would be me."

The Hits Just Keep On Coming: A Republican was campaigning across the South and his travels took him to a rural area in the Smokey Mountains which was not known to be Republican.

He stopped by a farm to do some campaigning and when the farmer learned that he was a Republican, his jaw dropped and he said, "Wait right here 'til I go get Ma. She's never seen a Republican before."

While waiting on the farmer to return, the candidate looked around to find a podium to make his speech. The only thing he could find was a large pile of manure. The farmer returned with his wife and the candidate climbed up on the mound and made his speech.

When he finished, the farmer said, "You know, that's the first time I ever heard a Republican make a speech." The candidate replied, "Well, that's the first time I ever made a Republican speech from a Democratic platform."

Two good ole boys from Louisiana decided that they weren't going anywhere in life and thought they should go to college to get ahead. The first went in to see the counselor, who told him to take math, history and logic. The guy asked, "What's logic?"

The professor answered, "Let me give you an example. Do you own a weed eater?" The guy answered, "I sure do." The professor said, "Then I can assume, using logic, that you have a yard." The guy said, "That's pretty good!"

The professor continued, "Logic will also tell me that since you have a yard, you also own a house." Impressed, the guy said, "Amazing!"

The professor went on, "And since you own a house, logic dictates that you have a wife." The guy says, "That's Betty Mae! This is incredible!" The Louisiana boy was catching on.

The professor said, "Finally, since you have a wife, logically I can assume that you are heterosexual." The guy said, "You're absolutely right! Why that's the most fascinatin' thing I ever heard! I cain't wait to take that logic class!"

Proud of the new world opening up to him, the guy walked back into the hallway where his friend was still waiting. His friend said, "So what classes are ya takin'?" The guy said, "Math, history, and logic!"

His friend asked, "What in tarnation is logic?" The guy said, "Let me give you an example. Do ya own a weed eater?" His friend replied, "No." The guy said, "You're queer, ain't ya?"

That's it for today, my little pumpkins. Remember, a good discussion is like a miniskirt. Short enough to maintain interest and long enough to cover the subject. I'm heading over to AREA 51 for happy hour

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More on Friday.

Stay Tuned !

1 comment:

jack69 said...

I agree on the opening, we have too much of that junk. Good read, I was with you all the way to the logic, then I spit my green tea.
Thanks for the entertainment and the laughs...