Friday, November 8, 2013

Throwing Stones From A Glass House

Liberals were all over the CMA Awards on their Obamacare skit, going as far as calling it "racist". Perhaps they missed Saturday Night Live's constant Sarah Palin skits. It seems like anytime you don't agree with liberal arguments and they have no genuine response to a criticism, they resort to using the word "racist".

It's sort of like when someone cuts you off while driving and you can't identify him (or her) by race or country of origin, you resort to calling him a son-of-a-bitch.

In my opinion, if something's funny, then it's funny no matter who plays the "fall guy". Witness Time Magazine's cover showing a silhouette of Republican governor Chris Christie and the phrase "The Elephant In The Room."

Time can fall back on the fact the the GOP symbol is an elephant and Christie is a republican, hence the phrase. But reading between the lines, it is obvious that Christie suffers from a weight problem and sometimes discretion is the better part of valor.

Imagine the rants from liberals in 2008 if Time would have shown the democratic hopeful Barack Obama in silhouette and referred to him as a dark horse. The liberals would have burned downed the Time Magazine headquarters.....

The News As I See It: Matt Lauer and Al Roker had prostate exams live on the "Today" show. So the "Today" show has finally cracked the code on what people want to see first thing in the morning. I can't argue with the importance of having your prostate checked but doing it during breakfast? This is not the first time Matt Lauer has had a surgical procedure on the "Today" show. About a year ago he had Ann Currie removed.

New Jersey Governor Chris Christie was re-elected by a huge margin. He gave a great speech last night. He said he learned a lot in the last four years — for example, that lap-band surgery doesn't always work. Chris Christie won by such a wide margin that pundits say this will give him the impetus he needs to run for president. His new slogan: "Put the oval in the Oval Office."

Obama's approval rating is down to 39 percent and Toronto Mayor Rob Ford, who admitted to smoking crack cocaine, went up to 49 percent. How does this make Obama feel? He’d be better off smoking crack than passing Obamacare.

Mayor Rob Ford admitted that he smoked crack a year ago when he was in a quote, “drunken stupor.” Geez, if that guy smokes crack when he's drunk, I'd hate to see what happens when he smokes crack.

Bill de Blasio, the new mayor of New York City is a progressive Democrat with an African-American wife who used to be a lesbian. The new mayor's campaign slogan? "If I turned her around, imagine what I can do for New York City."

Marvel Comics is introducing its first major superhero who is a female Muslim. The female Muslim superhero can fly, which comes in handy because she's not allowed to drive.

This Date In History: 1889; Montana became the 41st state. 1892; Former president Grover Cleveland beat incumbent Benjamin Harrison and became the only president to win nonconsecutive terms in the White House.

1923; Adolf Hitler attempted, and failed, to seize control of the German government in the Beer Hall Putsch. 1960; John F. Kennedy defeated Richard M. Nixon for the presidency of the United States.

1966; Edward W. Brooke of Massachusetts became the first Black to be elected to the U.S. Senate since Reconstruction. 1994; After a 40-year Democrat domination, the Republican Party gained control of the U.S. House of Representatives, as well as a Senate majority.

Picture Of The Day: Time Magazine's cover page of Republican Governor Chris Christie. Although Time is surely aware of Christie's constant wight struggle, they opted for "The Elelphant In The Room." Long known as a tasteless rag, Time Magazine once again shows why its readership is going down the tubes.....

Printable Things I Never Told You: 1) India recently launched a rocket to Mars. That's a heck of a place to put a customer service call center. 2) My friend had to sign a form stating she understands her mother's cremation is non-reversible. I weep for our species. 3) I do love you for your mind, I just like your mind a lot more when you’re naked. 4) I met a girl at the club who was so self absorbed, I'll bet she doesn't even need tampons. 5) Dyslexics are teople poo !.....and that's five !

Today's HoroscopeLibra - November 8th: The evidence for love is staring you in the face but you can't see the forest for the trees. This is easily fixed if you stop wandering into forests and stand toe-to-toe with women to whom you are attracted.

Birthdays: My friends Bobbie, Freddie and Robert - Happy Birthday 19XX, Edmond Halley, English Astronomer and Mathematician 1656, Bram Stoker, novelist 1847, Margaret Mitchell, novelist 1900, Martha Gellhorn, international correspondent 1908, Christiaan Barnard, surgeon 1923, Bonnie Raitt, blues-rock singer 1949, Parker Posey, actor 1968.

The AREA 51 Retirement Home Bar And Grill: I get on extremely well with the lesbians next door. They asked me what I would like for my birthday. I was stunned when they gave me a Rolex. It was very nice of them, but I think they misunderstood me when I said, "I wanna watch."

Two old ladies were chatting one day. They were talking about this and that and the subject finally got around to sex. The first old lady said she enjoyed sex all the time and just as much as ever.

The second old lady was surprised and asked her what her secret was. The first old lady said when she hears her husband pulling the car into the garage she hurries and takes a shower, jumps into bed and throws her feet up over her head. When her husband comes into the bedroom he gets turned on and has his way with her.

The second old lady decides to try this approach. That night when she heard her husband coming home, she takes a quick shower, jumps into bed and throws her feet up over her head. her husband comes into the bedroom takes one look and says, "For God's sake Maude, we have friends coming over tonight. Comb your hair and put your teeth in.”

The Hits Just Keep On Coming: A preacher was looking for a good used lawnmower one day. He found one at a yard sale that Little Johnny happened to be manning. The preacher asked, "This mower work, son?" Little Johnny said, "It sure does. You have to pull hard on the cord, though."

The preacher took the mower home and when he got ready to mow he yanked and pulled and tugged on that cord. Nothing worked. It wouldn't start. Incensed and thinking he'd been swindled, he took the mower back to Little Johnny's house.

He said to Little Johnny, "You said this would work if I pulled on the cord hard enough." Little Johnny said, "Well, you need to curse at it sometimes." The preacher was aghast. He said, "I have not cursed in twenty years!" Little Johnny said, "Just keep yanking on that cord, Preacher, it'll come back to you."

Little Johnny was in the garden filling in a hole when his neighbor peered over the fence. Interested in what the cheeky-faced youngster was up to, he politely asked, "What are you up to there, Johnny?"

Little Johnny tearfully replied, "My goldfish died and I've just buried him." The neighbor was concerned, "That's an awfully big hole for a goldfish, isn't it?" Johnny patted down the last heap of earth then replied, "That's because he's inside your stupid cat."

That's it for today, my little Puddy Tats. Remember, the worst part of the prostate exam is when the doctor says, "Guess how many fingers." I'm going to AREA 51 for happy hour.

Have a great weekend and more on Monday.

Stay Tuned !


jack69 said...

Enjoyed the read. You are so right about the Glass house, funny no one seems to notice how vulnerable they are when they throw.

I gotta go, but I wanted to tell you the kid is right about pulling that lawn mower!!!!

Great to visit you here. Take care and relapse, it could get worse… I hear…
I thought for an hour I had reached the Obamacare page it would not let me in!

Paula said...

Like that cat and goldfish joke.