Friday, December 3, 2010

It's Not A Holiday Tree, It's A Christmas Tree !

Well, the rhetoric has begun. Every year during the holiday season each religion puts up some symbol that represents their particular holiday and no one pays too much attention. That is, of course, until we get to the proverbial Christmas tree. Then, rocks start turning over and from underneath crawls the protesters and naysayers protesting the term "Christmas Tree."

Well guess what? That's what it is. It isn't a Holiday tree or bush, it's a Christmas tree. Virtually every other religion is left alone when they have their holidays and yet, there's always some one who doesn't like the term "Christmas Tree."

In Philadelphia, the German Christmas Village near city hall had it's name changed to the German Holiday Village due to protests over the name. The name was changed back to Christmas Village after protests from all over the world flooded the Philadelphia city hall.

If someone from another religion greets me with their own particular terms for their holiday, it really doesn't bother me and I either reply in kind or say thank you. The bottom line? Hey, for those who care, it's a Christmas Tree! For those who don't like it or don't care, it's still a Christmas Tree. Get over it!

Here's my new Christmas video and if anyone would like a copy, I'll be happy to email you one. Just email me or let me know in your comments. The video is also on my YouTube sute and I'll put in on Facebook this weekend.

Remember to mute my music playlist located on the left sidebar.

The News As I See It: According to the TSA, most of the people protesting the new body search procedures are men. At last they're getting to see what it's like to be groped by someone who won't take no for an answer.

WikiLeaks’ Julian Assange said Secretary of State Hillary Clinton should resign for ordering American diplomats to spy on their foreign counterparts. Thanks, creepy Australian guy who’s wanted for rape in Sweden, we’ll make a note of that.

California Gov. Schwarzenegger attended a menorah-lighting ceremony. He said he always looks forward to Hanukkah. At least I think that’s what he said. He might have said "I like to play the harmonica."

President Obama received 12 stitches in his lip after being elbowed in the mouth during a basketball game. Out of force of habit, he blamed George Bush.

Senator John McCain said it's time for a regime change in North Korea. To which the waitress said, "Sir, if you don’t order now, you’re going to miss the early bird special."

Happy birthday to Woody Allen, who turned 75 this week. It’s not easy to find a card that says, "Happy Birthday, Dad/Husband."

This Date In History: 1818; Illinois became the 21st state in the United States.
1833 Oberlin College in Ohio became the first coed institution of higher learning in the U.S. 1910; Mary Baker Eddy, founder of the Christian Science movement, died.

1919; French painter and sculptor Pierre A. Renoir died at age 78. 1967; Dr. Christiaan N. Barnard performed the world's first successful human heart transplant. 1984; A cloud of deadly poison gas leaked from the Union Carbide plant in Bhopal, India, killing over 4,000 people.

Picture Of The Day: I really liked this picture of the cabin in the woods that was sent to me by my pal, Wally. Neat, huh?

Printable Things I Never Told You: 1) Cuisine is something like food, but the portions are smaller and the prices are higher. If you happen to have a French cuisine, the waiter will insult you as you are served. 2) God made man before woman to give him time to think of an answer for her first question. 3) On electric toasters, why do they engrave the message "one slice"? How many pieces of bread do they think people are really gonna try to stuff in that slot? 4) Just when I was getting used to yesterday along came today. 5) One snowman said to another snowman, "Do you smell carrots?".....and that's five !

Birthdays: Gilbert Stuart, painter 1755, Ellen Swallow Richards, chemist and educator 1842, Anna Freud, psychoanalyst 1895, Jean-Luc Godard, film director 1930, Ozzy Osbourne, rock musician 1948, Julianne Moore, actress 1960, Daryl Hannah, actress 1960, Katarina Witt, skater 1965, Brendan Fraser, actor 1968.

The AREA 51 Retirement Home Bar and Grill: A man moves into a nudist colony. He receives a letter from his grandmother asking him to send her a current photo of himself in his new location. Too embarrassed to let her know that he lives in a nudist colony, he cuts a photo in half and mails it.

The next day he discovers that he had accidentally sent the bottom half of the photo. He's really worried but then remembers how bad his grandmother's eyesight is, and hopes she won't notice. A few weeks later, he receives a letter from his Grandmother. It says: "Thank you for the picture. Change your makes your nose look too short." Love, Grandma,

An old nun who was living in a convent next to a construction site noticed the coarse language of the workers and decided to spend some time with them to correct their ways. She decided she would take her lunch sit with the workers and talk with them.

She put her sandwich in a brown bag and walked over to the spot where the men were eating. She walked up to the group and with a big smile said "Do you men know Jesus Christ?" They shook their heads and looked at each other.

One of the workers looked up into the steelwork and yelled "Anybody up there know Jesus Christ?" One of the steelworkers asked why. The worker yelled, "His wife is here with his lunch."

The Hits Just Keep On Coming: My thanks to Brother Kirt and my pals Rose, Victor and Wally for their contributions to today's stories.

Little Johnny had a cussing problem and his father was getting tired of it. He decided to ask his shrink what to do. The shrink said, "Since Christmas is coming up, you should ask Johnny what he wants Santa to bring him. If he cusses while he tells you his wish list, leave a pile of dog shit in place of the gift or gifts he requests."

Two days before Christmas, Johnny's father asked him what he wanted for Christmas. "I want a damn teddy-bear laying right beside me when I wake up. When I go downstairs I want to see a damn train going around the damn tree. And when I go outside I want to see a damn bike leaning against the damn garage."

Christmas morning, Little Johnny woke up and rolled over into a pile of dog shit. Confused, he walked down stairs and saw another pile under the tree. Scratching his head, he walked outside and saw a huge pile of dog shit by the garage.

When Johnny walked back inside with a curious look on his face, his dad smiled and asked, "What did Santa bring you this year?" Johnny replied, "I think I got a dog, but I can't find the son-of-a-bitch!"

A few days after Christmas, a mother working in the kitchen, was listening to her son play with his new electric train set. She heard the train stop and her son said, "All you sons of bitches who are getting off, get the hell off now, and all of you sons of bitches who are getting on, get your asses on the train cause we're leaving right now."

The mother went into the living room and told her son, "We don't use that kind of language in this house. Now I want you to go to your room for two hours. When you come out, you may play with your train but you must use nicer language."

Two hours later, Her son came out of his room and resumed playing with his train.

Soon the train stopped and the mother heard her son say, "All passengers who are disembarking the train, please remember to take all of your belongings with you. We thank you for riding with us today and hope that you will ride with us again. For those of you just boarding, we ask that you stow all hand luggage under your seat. Remember that there is no smoking except in the club car. We hope that you will have a pleasant and relaxing journey with us today. For those of you who are pissed off because of the two hour delay, please see the bitch in the kitchen."

Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates. Saint Peter said, "In honor of this holy season, you must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven." The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on and said, "It represents a candle." Saint peter said, "You may pass through the pearly gates."

The second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, "They're bells." Saint Peter said, "You may pass through the pearly gates." The third man started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women's underwear.

St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, "And just what do those symbolize?" The man replied, "They're Carol's."

That's it for today my little sleigh belles. Remember, the tea kettle, though up to its neck in hot water, continues to sing. I think I'll go to AREA 51 tonight for the karaoke show. Have a great weekend and more on Monday.

Stay Tuned !


Heli gunner Tom said...

'Out of force of habit Obama blamed Bush for his cut lip'.... LOL. that's about right..Ha!

Tom Schuckman

Rose said...

Great Post!

Yes, it is called a Christmas Tree!

Why does this issue come up every year?

Hugs, Rose

garnett109 said...

great song jimmy

jack69 said...

Did you know Garnett was still around? He said he knew Carol and she had been wondering what happened to her drawers!!!!

Paula said...

You're doing good with the Christmas spirit Jimmy.

Julie said...

Love the song Jimmy, you're getting very professional with them. The jokes were a hoot today. I also really like the shot of the cabin in the snow

Joann said...

I REALLY LOVE the pic of the snowcapped cabin in the woods!!!

CHRISTMAS TREE is right!!!

I love the governator Hanukkah / Harmonica mix up!! LOL!!

And of course all the jokes are always good, but that one about the nun at the construction site cracked me up!!